“What is it?” I laugh nervously.
“It ain’t nothin’.” He shakes his head, looking like he’s scared himself.
“It has to be something, you look different...Vike, were you just reflecting?” I accuse him playfully. Hoping he hasn’t let any of those guilty thoughts he has over his family back inside his head. We both deserve to be happy.
“I am different; everything’s different. The whole damn world has completely changed,” he admits, gripping under my jaw and dragging me toward him again. “And I fuckin’ love it.” He kisses me like he owns me, and when we both start laughing against each other's lips, I pull away.
“I love it, too,” I admit. Excited for the future we have ahead of us, in this changed world, and knowing that with Vike, we’ll always be protected in it.
“Be cool. Be fuckin’ cool,” I tell myself as I look in the mirror of the men's room. I don’t know what the hell I’m doin’ here; this is a bad fuckin’ idea, and it’s fuckin’ dangerous. I have no idea what to say to her when she gets here. How do I explain who I am when I don’t know myself?
I already regret acting on impulse. I’m selfish for being here, and yet I can’t walk away. I could potentially be dragging a poor, innocent girl down a path of destruction, and I can’t stop myself.
“You stay right where you fuckin’ are, Sinner...I mean it,” I warn my reflection by pointing my finger at it. Staring deep into my own eyes, knowing he can hear me. I have never been the one in control. Sinner steers the wheel in this fucked-up head of ours; he senses my weakness, he hears my thoughts, and yet I get nothin’. I’m always kept in the dark.
Taking another deep breath, I head out into the barroom and immediately feel guilt when I see her sitting at a table looking all pure and fuckin’ pretty.
She smiles when she sees me, and I smile back, hoping with every step I take toward her that Sinner ain’t gonna snatch her away from me.
“Hey.” Her smile grows wider as I take a seat and try to stop my hands from shaking.
“Thanks for coming. I wasn’t sure you would. Can I get ya a drink?” I offer, wishing I’d have picked somewhere a little busier. I wanted discretion. I wanted to be outta town, but now it suddenly feels echoey in here. The two truckers sitting at the bar are probably gonna hear every word I say to her, and what I have to say is hard enough without an audience.
“Of course, I was gonna come. It’s not every day a handsome biker asks me out,” she tells me in that sweet little voice I’ve been desperate to hear again. “I’ll just take an iced water.”
“You drivin’?” I check.
“No, I got a cab here. I don’t drive.” She shakes her head.
“Okay, I’ll, erm...I’ll get ya that water.” I leave her at the table and head to the bar, placing my order and looking back over at her. She is the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. It’s why I’m here now, palms sweating, questioning myself and my motives while the bartender fixes her a drink.
“You look real pretty tonight,” I tell her when I return to the table and place her water in front of her.
“Thanks.” She bites her lip and looks down at the cute summer dress she’s got on under her denim jacket. “I wasn’t really sure what I should wear. In all honesty, I’ve never been on a date before.” The way she blushes makes me wanna drag her across the table and kiss her, but I hold back, and pray to Godhedoes, too.
“Neither have I,” I admit, feeling all kindsa fuckin’ pathetic. I may have fucked a fair few women at the club, but I’ve never done anything like this before.
“You really expect me to believe that?” She giggles, and I grip my knee under the table when it gets my dick hard.
“Well, it’s the truth; dating’s a little complicated for me.”
“Complicated, how?” Her head tilts in confusion.
“Look, Raya, I don’t do this...ever. I shouldn’t be here now, but something happened that day you dropped off those flowers.Something I don’t know how to explain...It was like a trigger. I couldn’t let you leave without talking to you. It was...have you ever seen me before that day?” I question her, thinking about the tattoo Sinner put on my rib cage. The likeness it has to her can’t be coincidental.
“No, the clubhouse was the first time,” she assures me, looking even more suspicious now. “Why?”
“No reason, I just—I’m glad you came,” I tell her again, not ready to freak her out just yet.
“You had my number for a long time before you called. I was starting to think it’d never happen.” She sips her water.
“I know, and I’m sorry; the club’s had some things going on, and I...I’ve been trying to talk myself outta this,” I confess.
“Why?” She laughs.
“Because he’s not—I’m not good for you. Like I said, dating is complicated for me. That’s why I’ve never done it before; I’m still not sure if I can do it, but selfishly, I’m here desperate to know more about you.” She looks taken aback, maybe even a little scared.
“Saint, I’m just a girl who delivered a bunch of flowers to your clubhouse.” She shakes her head, still looking confused.
