“You said it yourself, there’s history in that house. Ghosts you’ve both tried to outrun. Maybe going back with him isn’t about reopening wounds... maybe it’s how you finally close them.”
My throat tightened. “It’s not that easy.”
“I know,” he whispered. “It doesn’t have to be that hard either.”
“You’re okay with this?”
Dirks reached over and brushed his thumb under my eye where a tear had escaped. “I’m okay with you healing. However that has to happen.”
“I promised him we’d try to be friends. Over the next nine months... enough to work up to finally face that house again.”
He kept his hand on my face, cupping my cheek.
“It’s not just a place, Dirks. That house—it’s full of things I shoved so far down I forgot how heavy they were until he showed up at my door.” I hesitated, then added, “There are ghosts in there. Memories I haven’t even said out loud. That’s a secret I’m not ready to tell you yet. Hell, I haven’t even told myself.”
Dirks let out a slow breath, thumb brushing soothing circles against my skin. “Then we’ll take our time,” he said quietly. “Promise me you won’t carry it alone anymore.”
“I’m trying,” I whispered. “I really am.”
27
dirks
“Hey, Mom,” I whispered, nudging the front door open with my foot as I guided Luna inside, one arm wrapped tightly around her waist. Her laughter had died down on the walk from the car, replaced by a quiet hum as she leaned into me, her head resting against my shoulder.
She was warm and tipsy and smelled like a bottle of wine and that jasmine oil she always dabbed on her wrists.
“I can’t believe she came back.”
“I know,” I said. “It still doesn’t feel real.” I swallowed, rubbing a hand over my jaw. “Sorry I missed Christmas dinner.”
“Stop it. You’re grown. You’re allowed to be where your heart is. You coming home next month? You’ve got a bye week, right?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Then come by. Bring Luna.”
A smile tugged at my lips. “Might have to bring one more.”
“A friend? That’s lovely.”
“Yeah. Something like that.”
I wasn’t about to correct the woman who thought a salad could include Cool Whip, Jell-O, or half a tub of mayo. Let her think Jer was just a friend. No need to unpack the whole “I used to date her, she used to date another guy, then the three of us were a thing before one of us went to rehab and the other moved to London” saga.
I tucked my phone into my back pocket and padded back into the living room. Luna was passed out sideways on the couch, one arm draped dramatically over her eyes like she was starring in a soap opera.
I crouched down, brushing some hair off her cheek. “Come on, Luna girl,” I whispered, sliding one arm beneath her knees and the other behind her back.
She stirred just slightly, murmuring something incoherent as I lifted her.
I started toward the stairs, but paused halfway.
Fuck.
I stared down at her peaceful, sleepy face, and for a moment, I just stood there.
Jeremy.
