Molly: Sam must be so excited.
Me: He is. Guess I better get ready.
“The kid’s a natural,” he says, jogging over to me as I sit on the blanket we packed. He falls down beside me and reaches for the water, sucking it back and making me stare at his sweat-beaded forehead.
“He is going to sleep well tonight,” I say as I watch Sam practice kicking the ball in the middle of the stadium.
Yes, not only did Randy fulfill his promise, he upped it by getting permission to take us onto the hallowed Raptors turf. Sam almost cried with excitement when he ran out of the tunnel onto the field. It was about then that not only did I realize I didn’t have much chance to protect his heart, but mine was now hanging on by a thread.
When someone does something so meaningful for your child, it’s hard not to fall into a puddle at their feet.
“Who are you kidding? I’m going to sleep well tonight, that little guy has some energy!” he says, falling back and resting his arms on his chest as his chest moves up and down from exertion as he stares at the sky. “How do you keep up with him?”
I let my body fall back to rest on my elbows as I watch Sam in his element kicking the ball between the uprights. “Well,it takes a village. My parents are fantastic, and my brothers and friends help when they can. I couldn’t do it without all of them.”
He sits up, matching my position on his elbows as his brown eyes study me. “You’re incredible, you know that? Raising that talented little man and attending school.”
“He amazes me,” I say, watching my son. “He inspires me to be more, to do better.”
He rolls onto his side and strands of his hair fall over his brow. His hand shields the sun from his eyes as he looks up to me. “So, when do I get to see you two again?”
I sit up and cross my legs. “Randy,” I sigh.
“What?” he questions, sitting up and pulling me toward him, our knees touching. “I fucked up, Rachel, I know that. Please let me make it up to you?”
I stare off over his shoulder, unable to look at him and unable to give him an answer.
“Didn’t you enjoy the time we spent together?”
“Of course,” I nod, looking back into those hopeful eyes.Crap.
“Do you think I would treat Sam badly?” he asks seriously.
“Of course not,” I answer without waver.
“Did you not enjoy all the sex?” he asks with a slow, deliberate raise of one eyebrow.
Blush.I shake my head at his cockiness, relaxing at the way he brings light-heartedness to our conversation. “Of course I did.”
“Am I not confident enough for you?” he jests.
“You, Randy, are too confident.”
“Sexy too, aren’t I?” he says with a wink.
I roll my eyes at him. “It’s not just me—it’s Sam.”
“Good, wouldn’t want it any other way,” he says with hesitation.
“Randy,” I sigh. “You say that now but–”
“But nothing, please give me a chance?” he says, a hurt look flickering in his eyes, but it’s followed with a look of determination.
My heart hurts and I can’t help the tears that fall down my cheek as I quickly brush them away.
“Please let me prove this to you.”
“I’m not sure I can.”
