“I’m aware.” He knocks me softly on the chin with his fist, pinches it between his thumb and forefinger and pulls me to him. Planting a peck on the tip of my nose, he smiles and says, “We got you, Ever.”
My heart pierces on his choice of words. That he saysweinstead ofIis a small lifeline I cling to with both hands. “I know. I’m glad you’re all here. Let’s get to the reunion already.” Steering him into the kitchen, I swing my hand wide, showcasing the display on the counter. “I’ve got pizza, popcorn and brownies. Regular brownies before you even go there.”
He chuckles and curls his arm around my neck in a faux chokehold and kisses my temple.
“Where should we put our crap?” Lilly calls from behind us.
“Second door on the left.” I point toward the hallway.
“Okay, this setup, Ever. They went all out for you. No wonder you don’t want to go home.” Noah leans on the kitchen counter as Seth elbows him over his comment.
Ignoring thehomereference, I zero in on the first part. “Yeah, they’re too good to me. Ashley even pulled strings to get me into Pepperdine. He swears he didn’t, but I suspect he did. It’s not the easiest school to get into.” I shrug.
“Dude, let him.” Lilly slides next to Noah as they sit on the barstools at the counter. “Take all the help you can get. Besides, SoCal looks good on you. And you surf now. So fire.”
“Speaking of . . . when do we get to meet the new friends?”
“Tomorrow. They’re coming to the party. You’ll love them.”
“I’ve always wanted to date twins. Are they single?” Seth still has his arm over my shoulders.
“Dude,” Lilly and Noah blurt in sync.
“Yeah,dude. No hitting on my friends.” I bump shoulders with him as we stand across the bar from Lilly and Noah.
“Kidding.” He rolls his eyes. “Let’s eat. I’m starving.”
“Same,” Lilly agrees.
“Waves decent here?” Noah asks, stuffing his mouth with half a slice of pizza.
“I think so. Tatum and Lennon like it. I’m new, so I’m not sure I’m a solid judge. But you guys’ll see. We should go before you head back. I gotta show you my skills.” I fling my hair over my shoulder. “Not to flex, but I actually surf now.”
“Hey, can we check out Ashley’s beach right now?” Lilly shoves the last of her crust in her mouth as she asks.
“Totally. It’s beautiful. And”—I pull my phone out to check the time—“we’re just in time for the sunset.”
“Hell yeah.” Seth grabs my hand as Lilly and Noah slide off the stools, and we all move toward the door, taking our beers with us.
Chapter 20
Julian
Ashley’s home gym is next level, but this—standing in the waning sun, feet in the wet warm sand while the foaming waves tease my ankles—is helping me breathe, regulating my nervous system. The roar of the waves crashing on the shore mirrors my insides and drowns my swirling thoughts. The anticipation of seeing her again is like standing at the top of the Blue Lake cliffs, waiting for the free fall. I came out here hoping to find enough calm and peace to get some sleep tonight—to be ready to see her tomorrow. I’m not sure sleep is in the cards.
Before I resort to beating the shit out of a bag to exhaustion and risk injuring my hands, I’m giving Mother Nature a chance first. Beach sunsets rival those of Blue Lake, and the salty air takes it to another level. I inhale deeply and exhale, stretching my hands over my head and begin with some slow tai chi moves.
Her laughter hits me first. It’s mixed with other voices and laughter, but hers drives straight through me. I could isolate it in a crowd. I drop my hands and sink them into the pockets of my shorts. It’s almostdark but I make out the silhouettes. She’s on Lilly’s back. They’re both giggling as Seth hops on Noah’s back and they begin a “chicken fight.” I feel like an intruder even though it’s a public beach and I was here first. This is her world now. Still, I can’t look away. She’s ten yards out but doesn’t see me. I step back out of the surf, the urge to retreat and leave the beach to her driving me. That movement draws her attention, their attention.
“J-man,” Noah calls out as Everly slides from Lilly’s back and Noah releases Seth’s legs. Noah rushes toward me and grasps me in a solid hug, clapping me loudly on the back. “Too long, brother.” He’s all smiles as I hug him back, grateful for his golden retriever energy.
My eyes find hers in the dusk, barely visible, but I know she’s looking at me. Seth and Lilly flank her, protecting her. I love that she has that, truly. It breaks me a little that they feel the need to protect her from me, but still, I’m glad she has people like that in her life. It drives home that I couldn’t protect her when she needed it the most.
No matter how much work I do on letting people love me, the simple fact is if she’d never loved me, she’d never been taken at gunpoint. She deserves better than that. Better than me. “I was just heading back up.” I shake Noah’s hand, tracking the others moving closer to us. “Good to see you, Noah. I’ll . . . we’ll catch up more tomorrow.” They’re here now. I extend my hand to Seth. “Hey, Seth. Long time. Lill.” I nod once to Lilly, unsure if she’s neutral or not.
She silently hugs me, then steps back to Ever’s side.
“Hi, Everly.”
