“You didn’t know how?” he asks.
“No. Because you would have judged me,” I say softly. And that’s when it clicks. “You wanted me to guard myself becauseyouwere afraid of me getting hurt?”
When Jaylen chews on the inside of his cheek and his eyes look toward the ground; I know I’m right.
“I’ve watched you grow up, Harp,” he says. “I’ve watched you go through so much shit, but you’ve always had this fire. This fire that no one could ever put out. I guess I always worried that if you let someone in, if you let someone get close enough, there was a chance of them putting out that fire. And it would just be gone.”
I take a step closer to him. “Asher would never do that,” I say. “You know he wouldn’t.”
I can tell he’s struggling. I can tell he wants to believe what I am saying is true, but he says, “I don’t know what I believe about him anymore.”
The idea of me being a wedge driven between the two of them makes me feel sick. Hot tears begin to fill my eyes. “He’s your best friend, Jay. That never changed.”
“Except it did,” he says. “Best friends don’t keep secrets. They don’t sneak around behind your back. And they sure as hell don’t look you dead in the eyes and lie to you.”
“So this is it?” I ask. “It’s over?”
Jaylen wipes his hand down his face. “I don’t know. I don’t want it to be, but I’m going to have to think about it. I need time to think about all of it, Harper.”
I nod, wiping my eyes. Jaylen leans in and gives me a hug. I nearly come apart in his arms, but force myself to hold it together. As much as I hate it, I know I can’t force him to be okay with this. I can’t force him to trust us. Trust takes time. And Ash and I need to earn his trust back.
Chapter 43
Asher
It’s been two days since I talked to my mom. Seeing her like that breaks me. Knowing she is fading slowly each day is almost more painful than when Dad died. At least with him, it was quick. With Mom, I feel like I am watching her die slowly. Losing her slowly. And honestly, that’s worse.
But if I’ve learned anything watching the greatest love story I’ve ever witnessed come to an end, it’s that you have to fight until the end. It’s taken me years to realize this and accept it in my own life. Seeing Mom this way has put all of that into perspective.
It’s been busy at the office since we opened the speakeasy. Luckily, the grand opening fiasco didn’t leave too much of a crater in the Gatsby Underground’s overall success. While there have been some whispers in the grapevine of Denver’s restaurant scene, most people know nothing about the drama. There’s been a steady flow of people in and out since we opened.
It’s kept me busy at the office too. New cocktails with specialty ingredients mean a lot of networking. Usually that’s Jaylen’s area of expertise, but we haven’t talked much so I’ve kind of just taken over things for now. I wouldn’t say I’mavoiding him, but I haven’t really seen him either. He is probably avoiding me, which I understand.
As I start to pack up for the day, there’s a knock on the doorframe of my office. I look up and see Jaylen standing there.
“Hey,” I say, standing up straight.
“Hey,” he says back, rubbing his neck. “You think we can talk?”
“Sure. Although if you’re going to try kicking my ass again, I’m not going to take it easy on you this time,” I say.
“Oh, is that what happened?” he asks.
“The way I remember it, yeah,” I say.
“I think your age is starting to show because I knocked you on your ass good…without trying,” he says. For a moment we stare at each other, and then we break, smiles forming at our mouths.
“Listen, Jay. I want to apolo–” I start, but he cuts me off.
“No. I am here to apologize to you,” he says, and I wait. Jaylen walks in and stands in front of my desk. “I’ve been acting childish about all of this. I lost my temper, and it nearly cost us the speakeasy. I upset Harper and hit you. I’m not proud of the way I handled things.”
I nod, shoving my hands in my pockets. “You had every right to be upset with us,” I tell him.
“Oh, I’m aware. I’m still mad. You pretended. You snuck around. You lied. You kept things from me. You acted like there was nothing going on when, really, you were hooking up with my sister right in front of my face. I have every right to be upset with you,” he says.
“You do,” I agree.
“I have every right to burn the relationship to the ground. You doused the bridge with gasoline, and I could light a match right now,” he says, and I nod.
