“You handed yourself to Koerlyn.”
He said it with such blunt simplicity, he couldn’t possibly know the entire situation.
“It’s not that simple. I received a note stating he had Merelda, and—”
“I know what the note said.”
I stared at him, waiting for a flicker of understanding. There was none.
“So you know that I didn’t go to him willingly. That I was forced to do what I did.”
He took a step forward, and his cold façade slipped, revealing a fury that seeped into his voice. “You weren’tforcedto do anything. You made a choice, and that choice was to keep that note to yourself rather than tell me. To deliver yourself to Koerlyn without a thought to what that could mean for yourself or this world.”
No doubt, what I had done was dangerous. But for him to belittle my actions, to make such assumptions, was just obtuse.
I matched his step with two of my own, the metal cup in my hand trembling. “I spent a lot of damned time thinking about what it could mean for this world. It’s not like I would have stayed with him. I was already thinking of escape when I left the Citadel—”
“There were never any guarantees you could have escaped—”
“I’m not finished,” I bit out, cutting him off. His shoulders hiked up, eyes flaring with a spiraling temper that matched my own. “Clearly you don’t know what the note said. I could never chance Merelda’s life. She’s amotherto me, as you well know. There were explicit instructions not to tell a soul, and considering someone had been close enough to me to deliver that note, they would know if I shared it with anyone. Andbesides, if Ihadtold you, you would have stopped me from going.”
“You’re damned right, I would have,” he growled, launching into motion.
“And she would have died!” I threw the cup to the ground.
His hands were suddenly around my arms, hauling me forward until I bounced off his chest. “Except he didn’t have her, did he? You riskedeverythingfornothing, Etarla.”
Trying to wipe the surprise from my face, I craned my neck, fear feathering through my emotions. He was a fuming mass of power. His nostrils flared with angry breaths, and while those big hands had managed to miss the bruises on my arms, their grip was unforgiving.
I tried to pull away, but it took him no effort to hold fast. This was a training scenario I’d practiced before with Callen. His hands were occupied, which presented an opportunity to attack his lower body.
“Try it,” Harthon said, deadly soft.
I froze, any thoughts of attack fleeing my mind. Harthon had never harmed me. I never thought he would. But then again, he’d never thought me a traitor, never held me captive with so much furious tension in every muscle.
I swallowed against the dryness in my throat. “There was no way to know he didn’t have her.”
“Not for you. But if you’d come to me, I could have easily discovered the truth with my spies—which is exactly what I did the moment I found you missing.”
“With her life in the balance, I couldn’t take that risk.”
His eyes only grew wilder. “There was no risk in coming to me. You could have been discreet.”
Harthon was beyond reason. Hardened warrior that he was, he would never see it from my perspective. Skies, he’d never lethimself love Ana because it would have made him weak. And because of that, he was making me out to be some foolish girl.
Enough of this.
“I don’t expect you to understand, Harthon,” I hissed. “Maybe if you loved someone, you would.”
Something flashed across his face, slicing through all that anger. But a callous wall slammed into place before I could make it out.
“And if you’d ever cared for the welfare of others—for the greater good—youwould understand.”
I expected the venom. What I didn’t expect was to be struck so hard by his retaliation.
We both knew it’d taken time for me to accept my duty to help save this world.
“It might have taken me some time, but I understand my responsibility.” My voice, my entire body, trembled. “It’s why I was able to unlock the path into the Domus from my mind. It’s why I had the strength to make it back to you.”
