“Ah, listen, Frank. It was no problem at all. I’d gotten a call from a couple of fundraising committees in Ontario, this hospital included, and they asked me to come up for a quick intro. Coach Wilder prides himself on watching out for his players, you know? So, he asked me if Caden could hitch a ride up here.”
I was a lying liar who lied. And I didn’t have an ounce of guilt feeding Frank this line of bullshit.
“I guess I can see that. He runs his team how he sees fit and all. But don’t you think allowing this one”—he jerked his thumb in Cade’s direction—“to beg off from the team is a little soft?”
“Well.” I forced out a chuckle. “I’m just along for the ride, eh? If I know Zane, he’s got some method to his madness and all that. I’m sure it’ll all work out.”
Frank’s eyes conveyed his skepticism, but I didn’t want to humor any of his doubts.
“Caden, why don’t you grab something to eat and text me when you’re done, and we’ll head out.” I made sure to use his full name to avoid any sense of familiarity in front of his dad. For the first time during the conversation, I met Cade’s gaze. His facial features remained nearly expressionless, only his eyes widening slightly in a “what the heck is going on” kind of way.
I raised my eyebrows meaningfully, indicating for him to get going by tipping my chin at the hallway behind him, hoping he would take this chance to see his mom.
“Frank, if you don’t mind, want to keep me company while I find my way around this place? I told them I’d take a look. Maybe buy you a coffee, and you can tell me more about that championship. My dad’s always got some football game or another on the TV at home.”
I gave him my media-trained smile, praying that he’d realize he shouldn’t insult one of the coaches of his son’s team, however temporary, by turning me down.
“Uh, yeah, sure. Caden, we’ll talk more later,” Frank tossed the words over his shoulder. He matched my steps as I headed back in the direction I came. “Only if you spring for a donut to go with the coffee, too.”
“Since you can afford it.”I heard the unspoken message in his tone.
“Sounds good. See you, Caden.” I kept my tone light.
I’d buy Frank Kelly a million donuts if it kept him away from Cade.
eighteen
CADEN
Ispent the ride to whatever hotel Ash had booked for us in silence.
Simultaneously grateful and ashamed, I tried to process Ash witnessing the way my dad spoke to me.
A single moment with my dad could cause me hours of dread and self-hatred. But Ash had no doubt spent half an hour listening to a Frank Kelly Ego Special.
My dad couldn’t stand people who did better than him in life. He scraped by with the least amount of civility while waiting to unleash a tirade of insults behind their back.
God, what insulting things disguised as compliments had he said to Ash’s face?
His anger always translated into him telling me all the ways I’d never lived up to his expectations, despite being his little hockey puppet since a coach told him I had potential years ago.
Here I was, once again sitting in the passenger seat of Ash’s Jeep, still quiet but wide awake and trying to think of the right words to thank him for his help while avoiding bringing up the obvious issues with my dad.
How much of my dad’s vitriol aimed at me did he overhear? Did he regret offering to help me now that he’d been forced into the role of mediator in my fucked-up family?
I couldn’t imagine a world where a guy who made millions of dollars a year playing the game he loved would want anything to do with some rookie’s life drama.
My peripheral vision allowed me to see the motion of Ash’s head turning toward me as I stared at my clenched hands in my lap. The feel of his lingering gaze had anticipation building in my gut, hoping that he would be the one to break the silence between us.
But no. Other than when he’d asked me if I was able to talk to my mom after I met him back in the parking lot, he hadn’t spoken since throwing out that he’d drive us to a hotel to rest.
He must have been exhausted, running on no sleep and two cups of hospital coffee.
When we got to the hotel, we would part ways until it was time to go back to Lakeside. Maybe he’d be too out of it to wonder why I couldn’t produce a single word.
“Hey, Cade, we’re here,” he spoke softly as he made a right turn into a parking spot at an upscale hotel that I would never be able to afford. The probable cost of this room would be adding another building block to the tower of things I had to feel guilty about.
“Oh shit! I’m sorry. Hold on just a sec.” Suddenly remembering something, I grabbed and unlocked my phone, swiping to the app I’d designed to hold all of Mom’s medical records. When I’d popped in to see her, she asked me to email her most recent labs to the nurses’ station so they could add them to her chart.
