“Are you sure? I’d planned on hanging around the hospital, completely out of your way, and after you have a chance to see what’s happening with your mom’s surgery, we could figure out the next steps. But I won’t stay if you really don’t want me to?” Ash’s eyes searched my face, as though he would be able to read my true wishes in my features.
The problem was, the way I controlled myself on a daily basis seemed guaranteed to malfunction around him.
I cared a lot about what Ash thought of me, making it much harder to hide everything inside me when he was around.
“Well, I don’t want to put you out more than I already have, but if you are okay to hang out here while I go see my mom before her surgery starts and get the full story of what happened from Kait. . .I’d appreciate it,” I finished lamely, my gaze shifting to the ground instead of maintaining eye contact.
I’d appreciate it?I clenched my fist at my side to keep from smacking myself in the forehead. To my own ears, I sounded like an idiot who didn’t know what to say, making my gratitude sound hollow.
Youarean idiot who doesn’t know what to say, echoed my inner voice unhelpfully.
“It’s settled then. I’ll be here. Give me your phone for a second.” Ash seemed to ignore my awkward fumbling as I handed over my unlocked phone.
He tapped out something before handing it back to me. “There. You have my number. Text me when you know what’s going on, and we’ll figure out next steps, okay? Now, let’s figure out where you’re going, and you can head up to see your mom.”
“Okay. Thank you, Ash,” I said as I took my phone back.
As I walked away from him, I looked back and offered him a small smile, for once hoping he would recognize my feelings of gratitude when I hadn’t been able to find the words to let him know he’d made me feel like I had someone on my side.
“Caden!” A whisper-shout came from somewhere down the hall to my left as I followed the signs for the ER.
I turned around to see a worn-out-looking Kait heading toward me. Her usual medium Tim Horton’s coffee had been traded in for an extra-large cup this morning.
It could be straight espresso in that familiar red cup for all I knew. She had the right idea.
Even though I’d caught several hours of sleep, the weight of my eyelids signaled that my body didn’t feel any more rested because of it.
“Kait! Thank you for bringing Mom. I know you had to miss your night class.”
I strode to meet her in the middle of the distance between us, wrapping my arm around her shoulder on the opposite side of her hot drink. I didn’t need to accidentally soak the only clothes I had with me in hot coffee.
I gave her a gentle squeeze that meant “hello and thank you,” before letting go and following her movements to the nearest wall. Being best friends meant we could recognize the signs of exhaustion in each other, and we were both tired as hell.
“Hey. Are you okay? How’d you get here so fast? I figured it’d take you at least until noon since not many rental car places are open that late. Why didn’t you text me to let me know when you got here?”
A confused wrinkle appeared between her eyebrows.
“I did.” I held up my phone in answer.
A glance at my messages showed the last message I’d sent her as delivered but not read.
“Aw, shit. Stupid dead zones. It’s not as if the hospital Wi-Fi is thirty dollars a minute or anything.” She scowled. “I can’t wait until I can afford a better plan. I guess that means you didn’t get the message I sent you ten minutes ago, eh?”
“No. What happened?”
“Nothing. Don’t worry. They finally found a spot to get your mom into surgery. She’ll be going to pre-op at one p.m., so you’ve got some time to see her and then grab something to eat.”
Her concern for my well-being overwhelmed me when I added it to the way Ash had made me a priority over the past several hours.
Even as tired as she was, she was going to go wild once I told her that Ash drove me up here. It would seem like a confirmation of the very inconvenient attraction we’d discussed when she’d last visited.
I couldn’t deny that once she’d planted that seed in my mind all those weeks ago, it had taken root and grown into an unwieldy set of feelings that were getting harder to shove to the back of my mind.
My disproportionate level of embarrassment at falling asleep on Ash’s shoulder and subsequent avoidance stint screamed strong feelings of something more than friendship and gratitude.
Kait’s “I told you so” was going to be nominated for the Guinness World Recordsas the biggest, loudest way a person had ever been right in the history of humankind.
Hell, she’d probably engrave it on my tombstone:
