“It never stopped,” I answer quietly. “They were never planning on stopping.”
Bash’s entire body quakes with his outrage. “But you said… you said the chief was moved to Glaston. She wasn’t there anymore.”
A wet, humorless laugh pushes from my nose as I shake my head. “And I also said I was moved with her. She fully intended to keep me under her thumb for the rest of my life. It was a stalemate. She had my secret, and I had hers, but the stakeswere never the same. Her sacrifice would’ve been her life. Mine would’ve been yours.”
Bash worries his lip as he stares at me, then he slowly slides down my body to kneel at my feet.
My lip quivers harder as his hands skirt over my thighs, and I stare at the wall because I can’t bear to watch whatever crosses his face at the inspection.
“Is that why you did this?” he asks. “Because the pain was too much?”
“No.” My fingers shake as they drift over my gnarled mark. “This was their punishment.”
My hand moves lower, my eye closing as I trace the scars on my thighs. “These were mine.”
“Punishment for what?”
“Hurting you,” I whisper on a shaky breath. “I don’t… I don’t have to tell you what it was like to be separated from you. It felt like dying, and most days, I thought death might be the better choice. The guilt of knowing it was my mistake that caused this, of knowing that I was the source of your pain, was just too fucking much. I had lost everything. I’d lost you. My sense of purpose. My control over any part of my life.”
The blankets bunch between my fingers as my thighs jump under his touch. “It was only when I was hurting that I could breathe.”
“Xeni,” he whispers, and gods, there’s so much pain in his voice.
“It was the only thing that gave me any relief,” I admit in a whisper.
He’s quiet as I take a few flimsy inhales and stuttered exhales, but then his hands drag across my thighs again.
“This isdone, Xen. It’s finished. I will not sit back and watch you hurt yourself.”
“Then don’t make me go,” I plead. “Don’t make me leave. Don’t…” A quiet sob echoes through the room as another tear tracks my skin. “Don’t tell me this is over.”
Bash’s fingers roam my inner thighs before pushing them apart, and I draw in a breath as his lips land over the raised marks.
He travels a slow path across my skin, deliberate in every soft kiss as he inches up my legs. He pauses as he reaches my upper thigh, his breath heavy against my skin.
“I don’t think we were ever truly over, Xen. I don’t think I could ever be done with you. Can I…”
He trails off, and his mouth finds my thigh again, his lips more forceful as he travels higher. Hovering over my groin, his eyes are full of grief and fire, but also something much more intimate as they land on mine again.
“You’ve been hurting for so long, princess,” he murmurs. “Can I make you feel good?”
Just the thought of his mouth on me sends my breath stuttering, my chest rising and falling too fast. My body answers before my mind can catch up, and his eyes follow the flex and shift of my abdomen. He traces every involuntary twitch, before dragging his gaze back up to mine.
It might be temporary.
A stolen hour.
A fleeting kindness before the distance returns.
But I’ve always been so damn selfish when it comes to him, and I’ll take whatever scraps of affection he’s willing to give.
I nod, and it’s all the permission he needs.
His eyes don’t leave mine as he places a kiss between my legs. It’s soft and sweet, and full of promises as he presses a line of them along the satin of my panties.
Not wanting to miss a moment, I scramble to prop myself onto my elbows as his mouth grows bolder. He kisses and flickshis tongue, tracing the edges so the warm, wet drag barely teases my overly sensitive skin. His name leaves me in a pleading whisper, and my knees spread wider to beg for more.
His head twists to the side, and I gasp as his lips meet the crease between my hip and thigh. The contact on bare skin makes my control slip, and my cock starts to push out as a warm rush of slick spreads over my skin.
