“The SUV will work just fine for me,” I answer, unsure how to handle his concern.
It’s genuine, and warranted.
The busted front end of the SUV is visible through the open door, its bumper barely hanging on.
August’s frown deepens as he gestures at it. “You’re asking for trouble.”
I switch my smile from understanding to obnoxious and toss him a wink. “Don’t worry about me, sugar. I find trouble, not the other way around. I’ll be fine.”
“You’re self-sabotaging,” he accuses, and damn, if that doesn’t hit a little too close to the truth.
My façade slips, and my gaze moves away from his worried face to the collection of food I’m shoving into my pack. “There are fourteen of you in the village. If something happens, you need reliable transportation. Out there, it’ll just be me. I can take care of myself.”
August pushes a hand through his hair, watching me as I finish packing. I can tell he wants to say more, so I distract him instead.
“You want to help?” I ask, and he nods. “Grab that bag and toss it in the back.”
Predictably, Elas grabs it before August can reach the handle, and I follow them out the door after zipping my backpack.
A metallic squeal shrieks into the quiet morning as the hatch lifts, voicing its protest. The SUV’s front and sides bore the brunt of the collision, but the force of the impact warped the entire frame. It still runs, though. The engine is steady, and the axles are unaffected.
Elas tosses the bag in, and I set my pack beside it. The hinges scream again as I slam it closed, and I glance up at the brightening sky.
The weather is in my favor, at least.
“Do you really think Bash can help us?” August asks.
It’s jarring to hear my mate’s name coming from his mouth. These are two distinct periods of my life, colliding in a way that seems impossible, and listening to the others discuss him feels like it’s being done in a foreign language.
“If anyone can, it’s him,” I respond after a pause. “I just have to find him first.”
“You never said what happened between the two of you.”
Like every other time he’s probed for answers, I only shrug. “Things didn’t work out.”
August’s skepticism comes in bounds as he purses his lips. “Didn’t work out? We aren’t talking about some casual fling, Xeni. This is yourmate. What could’ve possibly made you walk away from that?”
A touch of my anger flares as I give him another practiced smile. “What can I say? I was always a lone wolf. And besides, it doesn’t seem fair to keep all this,”—I gesture down my body—“from the rest of the world. It would be selfish of me, and I’m agiver, baby.”
August sees through my sarcasm. He opens his mouth to argue, but before the words can escape, Elas’s hand lands on his shoulder. A silent conversation passes between them, and another pang of longing hits me at the easy way they coexist. Perfect complements to each other, and always so in sync.
I had that once.
Elas recognizes my need to escape this conversation and offers me an out as he gestures at the sky. “You’ll want to take advantage of the daylight. I’m not convinced those headlights work.”
“One of them does,” I say before gesturing at my eye. “We match.”
Regret flashes over his expression as his gaze lingers on my leather eyepatch, but it’s gone before I can figure out what I’m supposed to do with it.
August flashes another of his wide sunshine smiles. “Everyone is awake to see you off.”
“I’m sure they are,” I snort, but the smile I give him in return is more genuine than the others. “Thanks.”
The engine turns over on the first try, and I try to take it as a sign of good things to come.
August’s claim that everyone is waiting to say goodbye makes my skin feel too tight. I’m tempted to just drive away without another word. Keep them at arm’s length so they can’t topple any more of these protective walls I’ve spent a lifetime constructing.
Loathsome as I am to admit it sometimes, this ragtag band of misfits has become the closest thing I’ve had to a family in a long time.
