His shoulders tense. “What?”
“I wassocareful,” I say as I shake my head. “I always covered the mark, and never showered where anyone could see. But one day a prisoner panicked and grabbed my scrubs, and everything happened too fast. Aeliphis was there. She saw the color of your skin on my hip… she knew.”
He’s quiet as he takes in the information, the muscles in his jaw working. “Okay, so she found out. That doesn’t answer my question.”
I shake my head, remembering that split second that sealed our fate and stole our future. Such a tiny moment that caused such destructive ripples in time.
“She wasn’t going to keep our secret out of the goodness of her heart,” I say.
“So, what?” he challenges. “She would’ve reported us? We could’ve faced it together, Xeni. We could've lived in those tiny, shitty apartments, and let them study us. Hells, I would’ve let them tear me to pieces if it meant staying with you. We could’ve been together. We were always supposed to betogether.”
Tears blur my vision, and a lump swells in my throat. “It’s not that simple.”
“It could’ve been,” he says, voice rising until it cracks with the depth of his hurt. “It would’ve been awful, but I would’ve chosen it every time if it meant keeping you. I loved you that much.”
“You don’t understand,” I choke out.
He rushes to his feet, but I scramble to follow and grab his shirt to stop him from walking away.
“Then help me understand!”he begs as he spins to face me, ripping his shirt from my grip.
The absence of my hold on him is jarring, and I stumble back against the wall.
Bash steps forward until he crowds me, caging me in his arms like it’s a punishment.
Like it’s not exactly where I want to be.
“Makeme understand,” he pleads, searching my face like there might be a simple answer there.
“Please,” I beg as his eyes squeeze closed. “Please, Bash, trust me. I didn't have a choice. You ask why I kept that ring? It’s to remind myself of my promise to you.”
He shakes his head, eyes still closed. “What promise?”
“To protect you,” I whisper, the nearly silent words breaking. “I swore I would always protect you.”
“Protect me fromwhat?” he demands, finally opening his eyes to meet mine.
The silence stretches as dread mounts in my stomach, but even now, the risk is too great to share.
It’s the one thing I can’t give him, and the one thing he needs.
There’s war in his posture—the desperate desire to believe me clouded by the self-preserving doubt that tells him it’s just another lie.
“Please,” I say at last, fingers clutching his shirt like it’s my only lifeline. “Don’t go. I love you, Bash. Everything I’ve ever done was because I love you. Please don’t leave.”
He pushes out a shaky exhale, and his voice is pained. “If I don’t go now, then I’ll just fucking stay.”
“Sostay,” I beg, tugging on his shirt and pulling him close until we’re breathing the same air.
“Stay.”
His thumb brushes the tears on my cheek with a tenderness that undoes me completely.
“What I would’ve given to hear you say that four years ago,” he murmurs as he leans his forehead against the wall beside my head, our cheeks barely touching.
“Too much time has passed,” he says, voice thick. “It’s too late for us.”
“No, it isn’t,” I insist with a choked sob as more hot tears fall. “Not for us. We’re forever. We promised.”
