I nod, unsure of what else to say as she retreats into the hallway with the others. She says something to Cato, who nods with a soft smile as the door closes behind them.
Exhaustion hits me full force as I glance at the bed, then down at Xeni’s bloodstained body. My muscles protest as I carry him into the bathroom, and I groan in relief at the large walk-in shower that waits inside.
I set Xeni on the shower floor and start the lengthy process of undoing his filthy armor. My rage reignites as I remove his chestpiece and uncover the watercolor of bruises on his torso.
His lashes flutter as he takes a deep breath. “Bash?”
“Hey, princess,” I say as I set his armor aside.
He groans when he sits up taller, and I hurry to steady him. “Where are we?” he asks, blinking in confusion as he glances around the bathroom.
“Somewhere safe for now,” I answer.
His pointed ears twitch as he recognizes the blaring of the alarms, and he swallows roughly as his head falls against the tiled wall.
He looks so young.
So innocent and vulnerable as he looks at me like he needs me to take his pain away.
My throat is tight as I nod toward his pants. “Let’s get you clean, okay?”
Dried blood flakes on his pale skin, and he lifts his hands in front of his face. His fingers tremble as he stares at them like he’s seeing them for the first time.
“I should’ve killed him,” he whispers. “Why couldn’t I kill him? I should’ve… if I were stronger…”
I sink onto the shower floor beside him and reach for his hands, gently prying them away from his face. “Hey… none of that, okay? You were incredible, and you’re the only reason we made it out of there alive.”
“Ihatehim,” he stresses, the words furious but fractured, and his hands fall limply into his lap as he keeps staring at them like they belong to a stranger. “I do, Bash. I fucking loathe him, but I didn’t… I couldn’t…”
“It’s alright, princess,” I murmur, sliding my arm around his shoulders and pulling his head to rest against my chest. “It’ll be alright.”
We sit there amid the screaming alarms, the noise fading to a dull roar as I hold him tighter.
“I shouldn’t care,” he whispers after a long pause.
“You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t care, Xen.”
“He’s fucking terrible,” he says as a spiteful laugh escapes him in a rush of air. “He does awful, unforgivable things. He is evil, andruthless… and my mother isn’t any better, but…”
He shakes his head again like he’s trying to dislodge the thought.
“But?” I hedge gently when he goes quiet.
“But they’re the only family I’ve ever had.” The confession rips free like he’s ashamed of it, and there’s a lifetime of complicated pain in those words.
Love twisted into something toxic and loyalty forged in fear.
I hate that I can’t take it away.
“That’s not true,” I say as I grip his shoulder, hugging him tighter. “You’ve got me. We’ll be our own little family… just the two of us. Just like before.”
“I’m sorry I never told you,” he says as his hands fidget in his lap. “You had the right to know who I really am, and I—”
“Whoa, hey now. Hang on a fucking second, Xen.” I wait until he looks at me, needing him to see my honesty as I continue. “Your father may be evil, but he doesn’t define you. He doesn’t get to decide who you are. Iknowwho you are.”
My finger taps against his bare chest before I lay my palm flat, right over the frantic beat of his heart.
“I havealwaysknown who you are.”
