‘Please don’t apologise. If I hadn’t been half-pissed, I would’ve read the room and backed off quicker.I’msorry.’
I relaxed at his words. ‘Still, my reaction must’ve made you feel terrible, and the way I swung that soap dish at you…’ Laughed, embarrassed. ‘Not my finest hour.’
Sucked in his lower lip, before admitting, ‘I thought you looked feisty. I wouldn’t want to repeat the experience, for both our sakes, but it was like one of those action films where the protagonists hurl household objects at each other during a fight scene.’
‘So now I’m a kick-ass movie heroine?’ Inwardly pleased at version of me Ethan describing. Not weak and traumatised, but ready to take on world.
‘If you like.’ His blue eyes twinkled.
Breath sped up again. Pulled T-shirt away from clammy body. Sun was baking. ‘You do look for the best in every situation.’
He shrugged, blond hair falling onto his forehead. ‘Positive psychology is the secret to happiness. It’s all about mindset, and great for resilience-building.’
‘Ha! Now you sound like Albie. Positivity is all well and good, until bad things happen to you.’
‘Bad things do happen, I’ve just found a way of looking at them which helps. Along with the ability to stay calm. It’s about not worrying about an issue, until it’s an actual issue.’
‘Survive? What have you had to—? Oh. You said something about complex family dynamic once.’ Was intrigued, old journalistic instincts firing up,what’s the (human) story here?
A funny expression stole over his features. ‘You remember what I said to you?’
‘Journalistic training.’ Scrambled around for an excuse, ‘You need a great memory.’
‘Right.’
‘So?’
Pulled mobile phone from pocket and checked it, before putting it away again. ‘Pfft. I won’t bore you with the details, but suffice to say my parents don’t have a great marriage – there’s been infidelity on both sides – but rather than splitting up, they’ve pulled me and my brother from pillar to post between them. There are a lot of issues, and I get called to sort any conflict out, because I’m the eldest. Money’s an issue as well. As in, they haven’t got any. It can be exhausting.’
‘I’m sorry, that sounds hard.’ Sympathy pinged in my chest, and I reached out in comfort, dropping hand before making contact with his shoulder. ‘I’ve been lucky to have loving, well-grounded, happy parents, so I can’t imagine what it must be like.’
‘Yeah. I don’t like checking my phone. Always dreading what I might see on the screen, you know?’
‘I do,’ I murmured, thinking about calls from police and solicitor I kept ducking.
‘It makes trying to have any sort of relationship a nightmare,’ he muttered, picking at piece of lichen on wall by his thigh. ‘I’m always interrupted by calls and messages. It’s not what girlfriends sign up for.’ Eyes narrowing, seems lost for amoment. ‘Anyway, I deal with it because I have to, and that’s enough highly personal and sensitive information for one day.’ He raised head, making a jokey face. ‘I’ve probably said too much.’
‘Yeah, I thought you’re just a simple jazz-loving, cycling-obsessed, Mr Fix-it,’ I rejoined, surprised by how much had internalised about him. ‘But don’t worry, this is between us.’
‘Hey, I’m a keen runner, too. But thanks, appreciated.’ Laying his hand over mine, where it was resting on wall, he squeezed my fingers. For a moment, I froze, not sure what to do, before he lifted his hand and slid it in his pocket. We both fell silent.
‘I have a favour to ask,’ I said hesitantly. ‘Some information the association needs?’
Outlined my request and he nodded thoughtfully. ‘I’ll try my best.’
‘Thanks.’ I changed subject. ‘So, you said you’re mulling something over?’
‘Yeah. I’ve been offered a promotion, including managing a team.’
‘Wow, congratulations.’ The spicy scent of his aftershave filled my nose as he shifted on the stone wall. Blinked.Focus, Tori. You know he’s attractive. But you’re not interested. Right?‘That’s a good thing, right?’
‘It’s a step forward on the career path, with a pay rise.’
Made me think of hard work and long hours I put in climbing journalistic ladder after uni. Could career be rescued? Did I want it to be? But this was about Ethan, and recalling latest rule for living pinned in entrance hall, was genuinely pleased for him and his success. ‘Then you should be proud. Is there a but?’
Gave one-shouldered shrug. ‘Longer hours, and not sure if I’m ready for the responsibility. Although maybe I’m scared of leaving my comfort zone. The extra money might alsocomplicate things with my family… The real question is, just because you can do something, does it mean you should?’
‘Does a tree still make a sound if it falls in the woods and no one’s around to hear?’ I shot back, without thinking. When he grinned, I realised with a pang had missed verbal sparring with colleagues, and buzz of newsroom.
