I rake a hand over my face, blowing out a relieved breath. “I should’ve asked.”
She’s quiet. When I finally look back up at the screen, her narrowed eyes are reading me. “Have you ever been diagnosed with anxiety?”
“What? No. I was just worried I’d hurt you.”
“Okay,” she says calmly, nodding. “I think there’s a difference between worried and panicking though, and?—”
“And I wasn’t panicking,” I tell her gruffly. I was, but she doesn’t need to slap a label on me like that. “Why’d you leave?”
I’m expecting her to slide back into her bratty little persona, toss a cavalier quip at me with a smirk, but she doesn’t this time. She shrugs with one shoulder, a rueful smile gracing her lips. “Didn’t wanna do the whole morning after thing.”
“Could’ve texted,” I grumble, because I can’t really blame herfor not wanting to deal with breakfast and Mama and awkward conversations. “I’ve been worried.”
“The phone works both ways.” Her smile’s grown—still small, but a little less self-deprecating. “Could’ve told me you were worrying.”
I nod and then sigh. This is the most expensive silence I’ve ever sat in—both from a financial perspective and from a dignity one. “How much do you know about BDSM dynamics? You seem to know a lot, but I don’t want to keep assuming things.”
“I’ve never been in a serious dynamic or anything, but I respect them and feel like I know a decent amount about the culture. We did the aftercare thing before we fell asleep. I didn’t skip out on?—”
“You leaving my bed when I’m under the impression you’ll be there in the morning is a hard limit for me, Austin. From here on out. If you don’t want to sleep over, that’s fine, but I need to know that before I fall asleep.”
“Okay,” she says immediately, and it shocks me. I thought she’d argue or try to make a joke of it, but for the second time tonight, I feel like I’m getting her without her walls. “If I agree to spend the night and then I change my mind…?”
“Then you wake me up and let me know. I won’t try to convince you to stay, I swear. I just… need to know.” I trail off because I’m not even sure why it’s so important to me. It’s not right of me to ask this. She’s not mine to keep tabs on.
“You don’t have to explain it, Maddie,” she tells me. “I won’t skip out on you again. I’m sorry.”
The last bit of the wild feeling I’ve been dealing with all day leaves me. Anxiety, she’d called it. And logically, I know that’s probably what it is, but I can’t afford to be anxious over trivial shit like this. I’ve got a ranch to run and all the stuff that falls under that as well. Mouths to feed, paychecks to sign, animals to take care of, trucks to keep running. Where my little sister’s best friend spends the night shouldn’t even make the list of shit I’m concerned about, much less take the spot at the top.
“Thanks, Tex.”
She rolls her eyes and smirks, and just like that, we’re back. “Yeah, it’s gonna be a lot of hassle, honestly. You owe me, for sure.”
“I do, don’t I?” I run my thumb and index finger over my mustache to hide my smile. “Why don’t you let me take you out to dinner to make up for it?”
“I was thinking more along the lines of orgasms,” she says, sitting back on her bed and spreading her knees again. The lacy little contraption looks better now than it did in the picture she sent from the store. My dick twitches in my jeans, but despite how I’ve been acting lately, I’m too old to let it take over my thinking for me. I’ve got a goal in mind.
“Makes sense,” I agree. “Considering I had you whimpering for me so prettily last night. I’ll give you your orgasms, but I want to take you out first. Be a good girl and say yes for me, Tex.”
Her eyes narrow, but it only makes me grin. “I don’t need to be wined and dined, Maddox. Consider yourself getting the cow for free.”
“I don’t have any use for another cow. I’ve got a lot of those. I have plenty of use for a bratty camgirl with pretty pierced nipples who loves giving me a hard time just to get her ass spanked though. Know where I can find one of those? I’d like to take her on a date.”
I watch her lips twist and her nose scrunch. She’s fucking cute, though I’d sooner sign the ranch over to Colt than tell her that. I’d like to keep my balls where they are.
“It’s just dinner, baby.”
“We’ve gotta find something you’re good at, Maddie, cause keeping things casual damn sure isn’t it,” she says with a huff.
“Definitely not sex, either.”
“No, definitely not.”
I hide another smile, but she doesn’t make the same effort.
“Let me take you to dinner, brat. It doesn’t have to be a date.It can just be for shits and giggles.” It’s definitely going to be a date.
She snorts. “We shorten that phrase now, old man. It’s shits and gigs.”
