Driving fancy cars and wearing expensive suits will never change the fact that you’re still just some trashy trailer boy who killed his mother.
I squeeze the phone tight in my hands as hatred for my father and guilt weaves its way around me so tightly I can’t breathe. I’ve heard way worse over the years, but every single time is like a whip lashing across my skin, reopening a wound that I will never heal from.
You know you’re fucked up when you’d rather take a fist than words. At least when he hit me, the pain would override theguilt. The reprieve would be small, but in those moments, my chains were broken, and I was free.
Throwing my phone on the countertop, I grip the sides so hard my knuckles turn white as I force air through my lungs that I don’t deserve.
“Knox?” I hear Savi’s sweet voice behind me and close my eyes tightly from the sheer goodness radiating off of her that I’m so fucking afraid of destroying too.
“You need to leave, Savi,” I grit the words out, causing my jaw to ache from the pressure.
“What happened? Are you okay?” I can tell she’s closer now, even though my head is bowed, refusing to let her see who I truly am.
“Fuck, Savi. Just go…please.” I feel her presence seep into me, and it’s scary how much I want to drown in it. Her hand touches my back, and I flinch at the contact as I slowly raise my eyes to hers in the mirror.
She gasps as our gazes meet, letting her see who the real monster is that keeps me awake at night. Not even my dad could hate me more than I already hate myself.
Her big blue eyes widen in shock before quickly turning to something I don’t deserve. I wait for the fear and disgust to appear, but all I see and feel is something I will never be selfish enough to take.
“I’m not leaving you,” she says, clutching the sheet to her chest and stepping closer. “You’re hurting.” The bedding drops, and her arms come around me. My first instinct is to pull away, but her arms tighten more, keeping me locked in place and forcing me to feel her body pressed against mine.
“I’m not in a good headspace right now,” I say quietly, still feeling the demons’ claws in me as I fight to keep them at bay. “You don’t need to see this side of me.”
In the past, I would head to the gym or the rink and push myself until I was too exhausted to fight anymore, and if that didn’t work, I would find someone willing to let me fuck my anger out.
“You helped me tonight…let me help you.”
“Not a chance. I won’t use you like that.” My muscles tense as I fight the urge to turn around and get lost in what I know will save me.
“It’s not using if I’m willing.” Her hand slides over my stomach, and my dick responds with brutal force as all the blood in my body floods there.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I softly growl, feeling my control slip away.
“You won’t hurt me.” She kisses my back, and her tongue comes out for a taste. “Let me take your pain away like you did mine…please let me do this for you.”
The word please has me turning around and lifting her in my arms as I walk us to the shower. Her legs wrap around me as her mouth focuses on my neck. Turning the water on, I pull us under as her teeth scrape my skin.
“Harder. I need to feel you.” Her mouth sucks and pulls my flesh, biting softly at first but going deeper the more I encourage her. I want to feel pain…anything to dull the storm inside me and to take away all the other emotions that want to rise.
Pressing her against the slick tile wall, my fingers dig into her hips as I let her mark me until the need to touch her becomes unbearable.
“Hang on.” I bark out the order as her legs tighten around my waist. Grabbing both her wrists in my hand, I hold them above her head, exposing her breasts to me as I feast and sate the beast inside of me.
The shower rains down as I lick and suck the perfect tits in front of me. Her pink nipples are hard and tight as I pull themdeeply into my mouth. Every moan and whimper from her only fuels my pent-up desire.
Her pussy starts to rub against my cock as I reach between us and press my tip into her opening before filling her hard in one thrust.
I silence her cry with a kiss as I pour all my emotions into her, letting her take all the bad away. She matches my passion with her own as her heels dig into me, meeting my thrusts and taking me deeper.
Dropping her wrists to get a better grip, I hold her ass in my palms as I sink into her pussy over and over again. Her slick walls slide against my cock, and without a condom, everything is heightened to a whole new level. I’ve never once gone bare, and once again, I can’t seem to keep a single rule with her. My only focus at this point is getting to feel this sweet pussy surrender to me.
Slick with water, her body slides against mine. Each rub of her breasts against my chest sends jolts of pleasure shooting through me as I take her harder.
“I’m going to…” Her words die off as her orgasm tears through her, feeling her walls pulse around me. My name passes through her lips on a cry, and something deep inside knows I’ll never be okay if it’s ever another.
I make sure she’s fully satisfied before pulling out, and shooting ribbons of cum between our joined bodies as I groan from the force. My chest heaves against her as I watch the water rinse away the last evidence of how much of a selfish bastard I am.
Reality comes crashing down hard, and suddenly, I feel ashamed that she saw that part of me. I slowly lower her and grimace when I see the red marks on her hips and breasts.
