“Wassup, my boy? I see you got JJ’s rough ass back. I can’t believe he ain’t scared of them dogs. He’s for sho’ his daddy’s son. Hardheaded! I be telling him to leave the dogs alone.” Keith laughed.
“You know him. He ain’t gon’ learn. How has shit been, though? Is everything straight, and are you keeping them niggas in check?”
“You know I have. Niggas know not to play with me. You better ask about me. These niggas will tell you. Like Boosie said,I’ll pistol whip a nigga for ’bout forty minutes straight. They know better than to try me,” Keith joked.
I laughed, but we both knew he wasn’t lying. Keith’s ass was crazy. We ran it for a few more minutes, and I let him chop it up with JJ before putting him back in the car and heading to the grocery store. Keith’s crib was about twenty minutes from Harmoni’s shop, so I decided to ride past it to see if I could catch a glimpse of her. I found myself doing that at least once a week, but I never had any luck. When I made it to her shop, I slowly rode past it. Her car wasn’t parked out front, so I assumed she was off for the day.
I wasn’t expecting to see her because I never did anyway. It was just the fact that it was a possibility that I could have. I went to the Kroger store that was located a few blocks from Harmoni’sshop, so I could head straight home afterward. Once we got inside, JJ started grabbing all kinds of unnecessary junk and putting it into the buggy with him. I asked him to stop picking up random shit as I took him down the cereal aisle to pick out some. After he had chosen three different kinds of cereal, I left that aisle.
As I turned off that aisle, I bumped into someone with my buggy. Before I could fully apologize, the lady turned around, and I noticed it was Harmoni. She was holding a basket in her hand that was full of fruit and snacks. Instantly, my palms sweated, and when she realized it was me, she looked as if she had seen a ghost.
“What a small world! How are you, and how have you been, Moni?” I asked with a smile.
When she turned to face me completely, I noticed that she was big and pregnant. She looked to be around five or six months, and I knew we weren’t broken up five or six months ago. It had been a little over two months since Diamond died, and I initially found out that Moni was pregnant. She wasn’t big at all then, but looking at her now, I knew I needed answers.
“It’s only a small world because you are all the way on my side of town, just to shop. I’m good, Jakari. I see that you and your son are too. Take care. It was nice seeing you,” Moni said while trying to rush off.
“Wait a minute, Harmoni. Is there something you want to tell me? You’re looking pretty round for you to be pregnant by your new nigga. How long have you even known this nigga, and how far along are you?” I asked.
“Jakari, gone the fuck on somewhere. I don’t know what you are insinuating, but please believe the only child you have is the one in that buggy unless you hid another one while we were together. You have nothing to worry about on my end, and I’msorry to disappoint you. I wish I could say that it was nice seeing you, but I don’t want to lie,” Moni spat as she walked off.
She placed her basket on the floor and rushed out of the store. I couldn’t believe she had just read my ass like that. I wasn’t convinced at all. My gut wasn’t wrong on this one. That had to be my baby. There was no way she was that far along and that big if it was by Black. I looked at JJ, and he was unfazed by anything that was going on; he was just ready to beg again. I grabbed the rest of the things that we needed out of the store, then headed home with Harmoni on my mind.
The way I rushed out of Kroger after seeing J, you would have thought I was running for my life. When I got to my car, I was in a full blown state of panic. Never did I want to run into that nigga again in life. For him to see me today and question the paternity of my child was so unreal. Sitting in my car, I tried to regulate my breathing and calm down for my son’s sake. I tried to avoid stress at all costs, but with me bumping into this man today, it was unavoidable.
Unable to call Rowdy and tell him what had just happened, I reluctantly called Ciara. I was so nervous that J might really know this baby could be his. I just needed to vent to somebody. Once Ciara answered, I heard Trell talking in the background, and I instantly had a change of heart on telling her what I had going on. At times like this, I just wished I had more friends. Ireally didn’t have nobody to talk to other than my man lately. I decided to just go back to my shop and talk to Carmen. She was always solid, and I knew she would tell me how she really felt. I parked my car and rushed back into my shop.
“Oh, Lawd! You back after I told you to go home and get some rest. You just can’t stop working, can you?” Carmen joked.
When she noticed the seriousness on my face, she stopped working on her client and told me to follow her into the office. It’s crazy how without me saying a word, Carmen already knew that something was going on. She had really become someone I could count on to make sure I was always straight.
“What’s wrong? You were just fine when you left here thirty minutes ago. Are you okay?” she asked as she pulled out a chair for me to sit on.
“Girl, no. I went to get a few things from the grocery store, and I ran into J. He told me that I looked too big and too far along to be pregnant by my new nigga. He asked me if there was something I needed to tell him. I told his ass that he couldn’t possibly be the father, then I ran out of the store. I’m so fuckin’ shook! I don’t know what he’s going to do or how he’s going to go about things,” I explained.
“What was he doing on this side of town shopping? Girl, I’m so sorry that shit happened. I did not want him to find out. He doesn’t know anything for sure, so don’t trip about it. You denied it, so hopefully, he knows to stay away. He knows that Rowdy is nothing to play with, so you should be fine,” Carmen stated.
“I know J, and I know that he is about to push the issue until he knows for sure. He knows that Rowdy is no joke, but that’s not going to stop him. He had his son with him, and I guess he now has custody of him. Why would he be concerned with me when he already has a lot on his plate? I’m just so damn upset about this.”
“You have to calm down! You are stressing about something that hasn’t even happened yet. We are going to just hope that he doesn’t try nothing. He has no real proof that you aren’t pregnant with Rowdy’s baby. Hell, we don’t even know who the father is yet, so he definitely doesn’t. With everything he put you through, he just needs to let it go and take your word for it.”
I sat and ran it with Carmen for a while longer, and I hoped she was right. After talking to her, I felt a huge relief. Sometimes venting was really all a person needed. I had initially left work early, so I could go home and get some rest. Today, I was more exhausted than normal. I stopped at the store to get fruit and snacks to take home but was distracted by J. Seeing him with his son was always hard for me. The way he protected and loved his child was admirable. If the situation was different, he would have been the ideal man for me. I loved men who stood on business and took care of their responsibilities but not cheating ass niggas.
I headed home and decided to just say fuck the store run. Once I made it home, I slid on some pajamas and jumped into bed. I really needed a reset day. The bigger this baby got, the more exhausted I became. Rowdy called and asked what I was doing, and he promised to bring me some comfort food when he came home. In preparation for the baby, Rowdy had been in grind mode. He worked so hard to save for the baby. All he talked about was getting enough money to sit down and just focus on his family. He wanted out of the game, and I helped him come up with a five-year plan. At the rate he was going now, he would cut that time in half.
Just as I got into a deep sleep, there was a knock on my door. When I looked at my phone, I saw that it was some kind of delivery guy. I slid out of bed and went to the front door. I was greeted with two dozen orange roses and a large bouquet from Edible Arrangements. I smiled as I signed for my things, thentook them into the house. There was a card on the roses from my man, telling me how much he loved me and was thankful to have me. I shot him a text, thanking him, as I sat in my bed and ate my fruit.
Just the thought of Rowdy did something to me. He was one of the most ruthless niggas I knew, but he was so sweet to me. He showed his appreciation for me daily, and I never had to wonder or question what he was doing when he wasn’t with me. Rowdy brought his ass home every night and at a decent time. I really had what every girl dreamed of—a hood nigga who was soft for his woman.
I decided to try to go back to sleep and use today for my rest day because I had an appointment early in the morning. Rowdy had expressed how he had always loved to cut hair, and he was good at it too. Rowdy would always do my undercuts and have my hair looking fire, and he was the only person I knew who cut his own shit. I wanted him to know that he was heard and he was appreciated. There was an empty building next to my shop, and I wanted to buy it for my man. I wanted him to have passive income that was nowhere associated with street shit. Rowdy needed to be motivated to do something other than hustling.
Now, don’t get me wrong, he was into stocks and betting, amongst other things, and he knew how to make a bag. He just deserved to know how it felt for someone to have him, his future, and his best interest at heart. My salon made so much money in a week, and I was going to make sure my man’s shop did the same thing.
Rowdy came home at a little before nine, and he had stopped atBig Momma’s Soul Food.He brought me some smothered beef patties, mashed potatoes, corn, dinner rolls, and a large cup of Kool-Aid. This man just wanted me to suck the skin off his shit tonight. I thanked him for everything he had done today, then we ate together, watched TV, and talked about our day. I didn’twant to stir up some shit, so I purposely left out the part about seeing Jakari. I knew how crazy my man could get, especially about me. He understood how tired I had been lately and didn’t complain about me not cooking as much. He just made it his business to get us food every day.
Without even having to tell him, my man knew how exhausted I was. When we were done eating, he massaged my feet until I fell asleep. I would usually try to stay awake and spend as much time as I could with him, but something was just weighing on me. I knew he didn’t care; he always fussed about me getting more rest.
When I woke up the next day, I felt like I had my second wind. I was rested and ready to start my day. I made myself some oatmeal, and I made Rowdy some grits, eggs, bacon, and toast. We had breakfast together, then we both had business to tend to, so we parted ways.
