LOGAN
“How’s it going with Blair?”Ryder flops onto the bench in front of his locker and bends down to untie his skates.
“I think I’m making progress,” I tell him and the rest of the guys as they all begin to peel off their practice uniforms. We had a light day yesterday after returning home from our away series, but today it’s back to the normal grind. We have a home game tonight, then another tomorrow. We’ve got Thursday off, then we’re back on the road for another weekend of away games. With the season in full swing, our schedules are intense. Normally, I love the hustle of it all. I enjoy not having time to think too deeply about anything other than the game. Right now, though, it all feels overwhelming.
“You’ve been texting a lot,” Griffin observes. “How’s that been for you? Do you even know how to have a conversation with a woman if it doesn’t involve attempting to get in her pants?”
“Shut the hell up,” I say, throwing my disgusting sock at his head.
“Fuck, dude, that shit’s rank.”
“He’s not wrong, though,” Bash, of all people, says. “This is new for you.”
The infuriating thing is that they’re right. All of this is so far outside of my comfort zone, I feel like I’m a bumbling teenager again. I know how to flirt. Hell, I’d say I’m an expert at getting women to want me. But I don’t want Blair to just want my body. I want her to wantme. And that’s fucking terrifying.
“Fine, I have no idea what I’m doing. Are you idiots happy?”
“Yep.” Griffin chuckles as Maddox throws his jersey at his brother-in-law.
“Ignore Wright.”
“Graves-Wright, man. You know I changed my last name after marrying your sister.” Griffin smiles like the lovesick idiot he is. He turns to me. “You gotta kill your ego, dude. Women are only interested in the suave playboy shit if they’re only looking for sex. If you actually want a relationship with Blair, you have to be real with her. Figure out what’s important to her and be curious about it. And I’m not talking about faking interest when she’s telling you about things she loves, either. You have to actually be curious.”
My partner on the ice drags his jersey off, then continues. “Especially with someone like Blair, who doesn’t need you. That woman has her shit together. She’s strong and capable and badass. There’s no world in which a woman like that makes space in her life for someone who doesn’t bring something besides sex and money to the table.”
This is the paradoxical nature of Griffin Wright. He’s spent so many years convincing everyone he’s some dumb fuckboy, but he’s not. The guy understands women a hell of a lot better than I do, and he’s never been afraid of his feelings or talking about them. As much as I’d love to brush him off, it would be dumb.
“Even if I was thinking about dating her—which I’m not—what the hell do I bring to the table besides sex and money?” Sexis how I’ve connected with women ever since college. And my money is all half of them even see.
I’m very aware that my perception of women and relationships has been royally fucked by my dad and all of his many, many ex-wives. But until these guys started finding their matches, I never had an example of a healthy romantic relationship in my life.
My dad has cheated on every single one of his wives, my mom left me and never looked back, and then all my stepmothers did the same when things finally soured with my dad. Eventually, I caught on to the fact that no matter how hard I tried to get my dad’s wives to love me, none of them were interested in sticking around or remaining in my life. They were nice to me because they had to be if they wanted a chance to snag my dad and some of his money. But they never really loved me. Not a single one of them.
I realize that’s not how all relationships are. Maddox, Ryder, and Griffin have all found love with women who are solid. I’m not convinced that means any of them will end up living happily ever after, because life isn’t some idealistic fairy tale, but even I can’t deny their women love them. But seeing all that over the last year or so doesn’t erase decades of lived experiences.
“You really think all you have to offer is sex and money?” Sebastian frowns as he goes through the long process of removing all his gear. “Come on, man, that can’t be true.”
“I mean, the ladies love my piercings, but…”
“You don’t have to deflect with us,” Bash says, cutting me off.
My knee bounces, and I run a hand through my sweaty hair. The thing is, I’m a realist. IknowI don’t bring much to the table. I’ve lived a selfish, indulgent lifestyle for so long, I’m not sure I even have much to offer to these guys.
Taking my silence as its own answer, Bash shakes his head. “You’re the kind of guy who shows up, Byrne. You’re steady, youalways have our backs, and you never hesitate to put yourself in harm’s way if it means protecting the people you care about. And you care about people more than you want to admit. I’m pretty sure Blair has already seen that in the way you showed up for her brother when you didn’t have to.”
“It was nothing,” I say. And it wasn’t. Showing a kid around and going to a football game isn’t exactly brag-worthy.
“I doubt it was nothing to Blair,” Ryder says. “I bet it meant more to her than you know.”
“Anyone can show up to a football game.”
“Sure, but do they?” Ryder’s eyebrows arch. “Because from the little I’ve heard from Lexi, I’d bet you’re the first person who’s justshown upto a football game for those two in a long time. That matters.”
Agitation hums through my body, and I give the guys my back as I finish stripping down. “So maybe it did matter to her. Doesn’t change the fact that I have no clue what to do next.”
“The girls are going out again on Thursday. I think Blair’s brother is hanging out with a friend for the evening or something. What if we get them to meet up with us afterward? We can hang at our place, then you can offer to drive her home,” Griffin suggests.
“That’s a good idea,” Maddox says. “I think you’ll have to work up to things with her, so hanging out as a group and doing something low stakes is a good start. Something tells me that if you asked her out right now, she’d say no.”
