“I…”
“I know, sunshine. I know.”
Then, for the first time in two weeks, he kisses me. It’s soft, tentative,hopeful. As he pulls away, my lips chase his, seeking his warmth, needing his breath, needinghim.He gives me what I need, but only briefly, before he pulls back and rests his forehead on mine.
“Fuck, baby. I miss you so fucking much.”
I want to tell him I miss him too. But my head is still a mess, and if I give voice to how much I miss him and how broken I’ve felt without him, he’ll take that as me giving in to this thing between us, and I’m not there yet. Though I’ve done some realsoul searching, and I’ve been meeting with a therapist twice a week since moving in with Maddy, I need more time.
Griffin deserves to have someone be as all in as he is, and I want that person to be me. But I’ve realized that, despite living for twenty years without my dad in my life and thinking I was over his abandonment, that’s not completely true. I don’t expect therapy to heal me. I know that’s not how this works. But I want to make sure I can give the man I love the love and commitment he so desperately wants and deserves. And that’s going to take longer than two weeks.
He doesn’t wait for me to say it back, which breaks my heart but is also a relief. He just kisses my forehead and steps back before saying, “I wanted to stop by before the series to give you the book, but I also wanted to give you this.” He reaches into the inside pocket of his coat and withdraws an envelope. There’s an address on it, along with a name that sounds an awful lot like a law firm.
“What is this?”
He runs a hand through his sandy blond hair and won’t meet my eyes. “It’s the deed to my place.”
“What?” I’m so confused. Slipping my finger into the envelope, I pull out a packet of papers. The first is on official letterhead, and my heart picks up speed as I read the words there. He didn’t…
“I’m not giving up on us, baby, so don’t for a second think that’s what this is. But I want you to know that whatever happens, you’re taken care of. I moved my clothes and stuff out yesterday. Everything else is exactly where you left it. Bash is letting me stay with him for as long as I need to. I figured you won’t want to live with your brother and Isla once they’re married, and you deserve to have your own space and a place to do your work. The apartment’s yours. It’s completely paid for, and so are the next two years of property taxes and insurance.”
My throat is so tight, I can barely force words out, and when I do, they come out in a croak. “Why would you do this?”
There’s not a trace of hesitation or doubt in his eyes when he smiles at me. Only so much love that I have to fight back tears. “Because I love you, Mira. Because you’re my wife, and I promised to take care of you. I told you I wouldn’t walk away, and I won’t. But I realized that when you walk back into my arms, I want to know that you’re doing it with no hesitation. I don’t want you coming back because you don’t have a place to stay or because you feel you don’t have any other options. I want you to run back into my arms because there’s no other place you’d rather be.”
He trails his fingers over my cheek one last time before stepping away. I feel cold without him.
“Will you come to our home games next week? There are seats for you, Isla, and Lexi.”
It’s the first game of the conference quarterfinals. Despite the tension between Maddox and Griffin, the Rogues have played their way into the playoffs. It’s a huge deal, and to say that everyone is excited would be an understatement.
“Of course I’ll be there. I wouldn’t miss it.”
For the first time in weeks, Griffin gives me a wide, uninhibited smile, and my insides go squishy. “Good. That’s good. Well, I should go before your brother shows up and gives me a black eye. Start on that book, baby girl, and I’ll talk to you later. I love you.”
He’s out the door, the mechanism clicking shut before my brain catches up with my heart, and I whisper, “I love you too.”
“We need to talk,”I say to Maddox that evening when he walks through the door. Stalks through the door is more accurate. He’s been in a foul mood for weeks, responding to me mostly in grunts and nods, and I’m sick of it.
Enough is enough.
My brother scowls. “I need to pack my shit and get to the airport, Mi-Mi. Can it wait?”
“Nope.” Crossing my arms over my chest, I glower right back at him. Two can play this game, and I’m just as much a Graves as my grumpy brother. “Sit your big ass down before I have to kick it.”
The asshole has the audacity to almost grin. We’ll see if he’s still smiling when we’re done with this conversation. At least he does as I say, flopping down onto the couch with a groan. I stay standing. I’m determined to have the upper hand, which means I need all the height advantage I can get.
“You need to stop this shit.”
One dark eyebrow rises. “Stop what shit?”
“Stop punishing Griffin. You’re being a dick.”
Mirroring my pose, my brother crosses his arms. “I’m not punishing him. He fucked around, and now he’s finding out.”
“Stop it. Seriously, just stop. You’re such a hypocritical asshole, Maddox! Like a month ago you were trying to set me up with someone, and now you’re mad because I’m with someone good and kind and selfless because he’s not the guy you picked? Do you realize how ridiculous that is?”
Maddox pushes up from the couch. So much for the height advantage.
