My eyes widen while the brothers freeze, causing Jas to look around the room and say, “What’s so wrong with Annie coming down? Brit said when she drove me here that she’s awesome. I wouldn’t mind meeting her.”
“No!” we all instantly shout, making her jump in shock, and I wince, “Uh, buttercup, I don’t want you getting any ideas, the shit she does, we uh, yeah, we don’t want it.”
Jas’s lips twitch, and I narrow my eyes at the little minx.
“You’re playing with us.” I accuse with a mock glare, and she grins as the brothers relax and Doc holds up my cut that I chucked on the floor nearly two months ago, and I swallow hard.
“Put your cut back on, enforcer,” he says and Jas takes it from him as she steps out of my hold before holding it up to me and I take a deep breath before removing my coat, passing it to a giddy Thunder next to me and I slowly take the cut from my girl then put it on. The leather fitting just fucking right and everything settles deep inside me. While Jas grins, her eyes watering and I pull her back into my arms and slam my lips against hers, everything feeling so fucking perfect despite the talks we still need to have but something deep in my gut niggles at me, pulling me that we’ve forgotten about something but as Jas wraps her arms around my waist, the feeling goes and I melt into her, ready to get her on the back of my Harley with my property cut on her back where she belongs.
Chapter 25
Jasmine – Five Days Later
I smile as a giggling Aisling runs around the yard after Coby and Simba in the afternoon sun while they dodge her, barking playfully, and I swear I melt on the spot at her cuteness.
She is so at ease here—happier, more settled. I can’t help feeling guilty for keeping her away so long, especially knowing Logan would have protected her and that guilt grows every time I see Logan’s sad look as she spins in the tutu he bought for her. It breaks my heart.
I know he’s thinking about all the firsts he missed. Even though we’re settled and in a happy place, I can still sense his resentment and the shift leaves me uncertain about our future together. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not giving up. I’m going to fight for him, for us, I just don’t know how to help him let go of the resentment he feels towards me.
I don’t want to lose him again. The first time I left, it nearly broke me, and the only reason I managed to survive was because of Ais. I know I won’t survive again, the man consumes me, he’s my everything.
Aisling squeals out another giggle, and I smile, seeing her lying on the grass and Coby licking her face.
I know keeping her away was for the best—or so I thought. Now, I question myself, especially seeing Logan’s daily pain over what he missed. He saved her, saved me, and that makes me second-guess everything. Honestly, I’m beginning to see I was wrong. However emotional or scared I was, I could have told him what was threatened years ago. He would have kept our daughter and me safe, just as he did last week.
I’ve never felt regret like this before. When I was leaving, I convinced myself I was doing the right thing. But now, I realize I wasn’t, was I?
I hurt the ones that were there for me, that held me up and kept me going. I hurt the woman I saw as a mother, especially when I only rang her once after I left right before she died.
It’s one of the reasons why I refused her money, the inheritance, that and all I wanted was time back with my grandmother, time I chose to lose believing I was doing the right thing.
I swallow hard. I hurt Granny and wasn’t there for her before she died, I lost time with Logan, and I kept him from his daughter.
All the choices I made, they’re now coming to bite me in the ass because I think they were wrong, and the fact I stayed away for so long, struggling on my own, missing the person who became my all.
I sigh as I drop my head for a moment, listening to Aisling's giggles, and a little bit of sadness fills me, my emotions all over the place at the moment.
Logan has been gone for three days on a run, and I’ve barely heard from him. I knew this would happen. I’ve gone through it before because he’s got to concentrate. He’s the enforcer for the club, their protector. But with the space we’re in, my mind has wandered and not in a good way. More like, ‘is he going to change his mind’ type of wondering.
We seem good. He smiles at me, holds me, even makes love to me, but, the resentment lingers and pain sits quietly between us.
I sigh, watching Aisling on the grass with the dogs. The urge to call Logan presses in, and I really try to fight it, but…
My insecurities build and I need to hear his voice. I grab my phone and go to unlock it just as it rings, and my heart stutters thinking it’s him, but sigh, seeing it’s not.
"Dammit, what is wrong with me? He’ll be home soon." I mutter as I watch Aisling, disappointment building, then answer, "Hey Brady."
Okay, seriously, what is wrong with me?
“How you doing, little sister?” he replies, and I wiggle my nose.
“That question is too hard, try another,” I admit and he chuckles, which sounds very weird coming from him.
Growing up, we weren’t close. With Madison Williams as your mother, it’s no surprise. He was the golden child, and I got the rough treatment after he learned quickly to do as she said.
“You still worried about Tank being gone?” he asks, and I hum.
“It’s quieter when he isn’t here, and I let my mind wander,” I admit, and my brother sighs.
