I swallow the emotion forming in my throat. His sincerity is my undoing. ‘What are we going to do?’ I whisper. I don’t mean this evening, I mean in general. We both know being a couple will end my career.
‘We’re not going to panic. That’s the main thing.’ He sweeps his thumb across my cheekbone. ‘One day at a time.’ Our eyes meet and a silent agreement passes between us.
‘I can live with that.’ Can’t I?
No labels.
No big drama.
No rush to find the right answers for what we are or what we’re doing or what any of this means for my business or my new book.
I want him more than I’ve ever wanted anything.
I want him here in my kitchen, and in my home, because he’s already worked his way into my heart.
God help me. I don’t know how this is going to end, but I do know I’m nowhere near ready to find out.
Chapter Thirty
RONAN
When I rushed home to make the lasagne after swimming lessons, I envisaged dropping it at the door. Maybe, if I was lucky, I thought Savannah might text or call when she’d put the twins to bed.
What I didn’t envision was sitting around the table with Savannah and the girls for an impromptu dinner and a bottle of wine.
I didn’t envision I’d get the chance to see Savannah’s shoulders sag with relief or witness a small spark replacing the initial weariness lingering in her eyes when I arrived.
And I didn’t envision how good any single one of those things would feel, let alone all of them.
‘I can’t believe you’re here!’ Isla exclaims, brandishing a forkful of tomato-soaked mince and pointing it at me.
‘Neither can I.’ I chance a look at Savannah, who’s surveying the scenario with a small smile.
‘We never had a boy over for dinner before,’ Eden says, glancing suspiciously between Savannah and me.
‘It’s brilliant, isn’t it?’ Isla nudges her sister. ‘Can you come over more often?’
Savannah clears her throat noisily and takes a huge swig of wine.
‘I’ll come any time your mam lets me.’ I throw a wink in Savannah’s direction, and she splutters. For a second, I think she might spit her wine across the table.
I put my cutlery down and push my plate away. ‘Do you know what would be truly brilliant, girls? If you could help me clean up and then we could do another one of those dance routines while your mammy finishes her work, then maybe she can relax then too?’ My eyes stray to Savannah again, hoping I’m not pushing my luck.
She mouths a silent thank you as her foot finds mine beneath the table.
I thought she was amazing before, but I’m just beginning to see how magnificent she is, how much she contends with on her own.
‘Will you stay and put us to bed tonight?’ Isla begs, giving me her best puppy dog eyes.
‘That’s up to your mam.’ I swirl my glass, staring at the wine while Savannah thinks about it. If I drink much more of this, someone will have to putmeto bed.
‘I don’t want to put you out.’ Savannah’s foot scales my calf, caressing the back of it. ‘You’ve already done so much.’
I’ll do so much more, if only she’d let me.
‘It would be a pleasure.’ As will the alone time we might get afterwards, if Savannah gets her work finished.
Her tongue slides over her lower lip and she readjusts herself. Bingo. It appears we’re on the same page.
