‘No freaking way!’ Ashley squeals, her parted mouth hanging open.
‘Yep. Fuck. My. Life.’
‘Why? What’s wrong with that? You’re both single consenting adults. The sex would be electric. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.’ The kettle hisses to the boiling.
‘I think we need something stronger than tea for this conversation.’ And because she unintentionally poked my Finn-shaped wound. I point at the wine rack mounted above the sink.
‘Will your dads collect you?’ Ashley is the sensible friend. Always has been, always will be.
‘Yep. They’d love the excuse to come and see you.’ It’s true. My dads love my friends. They consider them second daughters.
They’d have adopted more kids if they could, but sadly the way things were in Ireland thirty years ago, two gay men adopting children simply wasn’t an option. The only reasonthey could adopt me is because my mother signed over sole care of me to Stuart in a legal document.
Stuart is my uncle. My mother’s brother. I’m not religious but every day I thank God or whoever is out there for that fact. Without Stuart and Steve, there’s no telling where I might have ended up.
‘Great, I have a nice bottle of Gavi in the fridge. Let’s take it out to the garden.’ Ashley sashays across the kitchen, swinging her hips.
A swell of guilt flickers through me. The twins.
‘Don’t even think about feeling guilty for taking some time for yourself.’ Ashley is a mind reader. ‘You’re no good to them if your cup is empty.’ She thrusts an empty wine glass into the air. ‘But don’t worry, Sav, I’m going to fill it up for you.’
I follow her through to the L-shaped white wicker couch in her garden and slump onto the plush baby blue cushions.
‘So, explain why you can’t have sex with Mr So-Hot-I’m-On-Fire-Under-Water.’ Ashley fills the wine glasses as I fire off a quick text to Stuart asking him to collect me in a couple of hours. My dads are heading off on a month-long cruise next week, so they’ll probably be only too happy to get some extra time with the twins today.
‘Hello… he’s a manwhore and I’m Single Sav, author ofSingle Sav’s Guide To Winging Parenthood Alone.’
‘Well, maybe it’s time you wrote the next book,Single Sav’s Guide To Shagging Her Swimming Instructor.’Ashley hands me a glass of wine and I take a huge slug.
‘If I start dating, it will destroy my brand, everything I’ve ever worked for. It could alienate the millions of single women who relate to me. And especially a player like Ronan.’
‘You underestimate the power of a good, old-fashioned happy ending. They’d probably love to see you settled. And the man has a past. So what? At least he’s had enoughpractice that he’ll know what to do with it.’ Ashley’s upturned palm swats the air. ‘Do you think, given half the chance, those same single women wouldn’t ride off on Ronan Rivers’ giant cock into the sunset?’
I snort. ‘I take it you’ve seen the footage of his last race? Those budgie smugglers…’
‘Were smuggling something significant.’ Ashley nestles into the couch beside me. ‘Why do you think I invited him to teach at St. Jude’s?’ She snorts, slapping the couch beside her.
‘You are so bad.’ I shake my head and take a sip of cool, crisp wine.
‘Let’s cut to the crux of it. You’re scared of letting anyone in.’
‘Wow.’ Slice me open with a razor-sharp accuracy, why don’t you? ‘Straight for the jugular.’
‘You were hurt by the last man who you let in. So much so that you’ve never even told us his name.’ Ashley eyes me over her glass. ‘I think deep down, you’re terrified of it happening again.’
I take another huge mouthful of Gavi. She’s right. There’s no point even trying to deny it. ‘Okay, that’s a part of it.’
‘A huge part,’ Ashley insists, using her hand to shield her eyes from the sun.
‘But even if that were true, and I’m not saying it is.’ I tug my sunglasses from where they’re tucked into the front of my dress and slip them on. Not to shield my eyes from the sun, but to shield them from Ashley’s scrutiny. ‘It doesn’t take away my branding issue. I can’t just do a complete one-eighty. The reason I’ve snagged so many advertising deals for baby ranges is because I’m a single mother.’
‘Yes, but that doesn’t mean you have to be single forever.’ Ashley thrusts a hand into the air to emphasise her point.
‘Hmm.’ I can’t agree.
Dating now seems hypocritical, given support for mysituation as a single mother elevated my career to where it is today.
‘Besides, who says anyone has to know?’ Ashley’s green eyes glint with mischief. ‘Have sex with the swimming instructor. See how it goes. You don’t have to announce it to the world. It’s not like you’re getting married. You don’t even have to date him, just shag him.’
