I barely slept a wink on Wednesday night. Not because Teagan left, but because Ava didn't leave when Phoebe asked her not to. She stayed for my daughter, a girl she’s only met a handful of times yet was so desperate to comfort and reassure.
Did I freak out a bit at the talk of her wanting kids?
Absolutely.
No one can do a complete one-eighty overnight.
But am I open to the possibility of it at some point in the distant future?
Yes, I think I am. Because one thing’s for sure, Ava Jackson is one in a million. There’s no way I’m going to stand back and let another man give her all the things she deserves because I was too chicken shit to even try.
She’s like no one I’ve ever met before. Or am likely to meet again.
As long as we take it slowly, it’ll be okay.
Ava opens the door to her apartment. Moonlight shines in through the balcony doors casting a luminous glow on Ava’s pristine home. Its decadence is unquestionable, but it’s devoid of any decorations, or any of Ava’s warmth or personality.
‘I can’t believe you didn’t put the decorations up. I thought we talked about this.’
‘We did talk about it.’ Ava kicks off her heels by the door and rubs her right heel. ‘Not everyone wants a pink sparkly tree cluttering their home, Cillian.’
‘You can’t fool me.’ I hoist her up on to her kitchen work top and take over the foot massage she started to give herself. ‘I saw the way you were staring lustfully at those metallic baubles.’
‘No, I believe it was you I was staring lustfully at, thinking about your “metallic baubles” while you had your face between my legs.’ Her head rolls back as I knead the balls of her feet with my thumbs. ‘Besides, I told you, it’s pointless just for me. Christmas trees are for couples and families.’
‘And aren't we a couple?’ I cup her chin and angle her face towards mine. ‘Besides, I told you, nothing’s pointless “just for you”. You’re the warmest person I’ve ever met but your apartment is cold. I hate the thought of you sitting here alone.’
‘I’m not alone. I have you here now.’
‘Tonight, you do, but when I have to get back to my responsibilities, when I’m in my house, I want you to have some light on these dark December nights. I’m going to buy you a Christmas tree.’
‘I have one.’ She points a finger to a small square loft entrance above the front door. A small smile plays on her lips. ‘It’s in the attic.’
I roll my eyes. ‘Of course it is. That’s why you didn't put it up, it’s too much work. Please tell me you have something up there to decorate it with.’
‘I do, but you don’t have to do this.’ She says that, but there’s no missing the excitement sparking in her eyes. Christmas brings out the inner kid in all of us.
There’s something magical about this time of year. It feels like a really coupley thing to do, decorate a tree together.
‘I want to do this with you. Let's start our own tradition, like your parents.’ By hiding behind my clipped, cold exterior, I’ve deprived myself of so much fun. That stops now. ‘Then we’re going to find that lustful stare of yours again, deal?’
Her lips curl upwards exposing neat white teeth. ‘You’re like a dog with a bone.’
‘Couldn't have put it better myself, baby.’ I grab her hand and brush it over my ever-ready erection.
A tiny squeal of delight surges out from between her parted lips. ‘You big tease.’
‘It’ll be worth the wait.’ I promise. ‘Get the drinks.’
‘I have a bottle of champagne in the fridge. It’s been screaming “pop me” all week.’
By the time I wrestle the tree out of the loft I’m sweating like a criminal in court and covered in a thick film of dust.
Ava takes one look at me. ‘Take those clothes off, will you, you’ll destroy the place! I’ll wash them for you. They’ll be dry by the morning.’
‘Desperate to get my clothes off one way or another, aren't you?’ I unbuckle my belt and step out of my trousers, watching as her greedy gaze drinks in my black boxer briefs.
I’d love nothing more than to take her on the couch right now but making her wait is all part of the foreplay. I unbutton my shirt and toss it on the kitchen counter. She drinks in the smooth planes of my torso, with a hum of appreciation.
