‘Yeah, but did you happen to go on social media this morning?’ She pauses and my stomach sinks. Not more shit from Dan, please.
‘No. I still haven’t reinstalled the apps. The video might be gone, but I’m pretty sure I’ll still have three billion notifications that I can’t deal with.’
‘The press got wind that Nate’s in Dublin. He was papped going into Brown Thomas with a “mystery brunette” yesterday, and the media is going wild with speculation, especially given it’s only a few weeks since he announced his split from Celeste.’
‘Oh.’ It takes a minute to register what Savannah is telling me. ‘Do you think they’ll put two and two together and realise that it’s me in that god-awful video?’
‘Oh, honey, it’s just a matter of time, but you knew that, right?’ Savannah says. ‘It was always going to happen at some point. The #amanscorned is still growing every day thanks to Nate sharing, but it’s another clue back to you.’
‘Thanks for the heads up.’ For the millionth time, I thank my lucky stars for my friends.
‘So, Sancerre at Heaven on Earth?’ Savannah says. ‘I’ll text Ashley. She might need an excuse to get away from that dry shite, Matt.’
‘Sav, I haven’t been there since…’ The most mortifying night of my life flashes through my mind in slow motion. I wouldn’t mind, but it’s not like I can even really remember the details. They’re hazy from the wine. No, what I’m reliving is worse. It’s the image that millions of people have seen. My spirited breasts boinging up and down like a couple of bouncy balls.
Savannah tuts. ‘You haven’t been there since you shacked up with Hollywood’s hottest movie star.’
Heaven on Earth is wedged. Christmas parties congregate around the stylish, chrome tables and at the edge of the dancefloor.Patrons wear reindeer ears and sexy Santa hats, along with their seasonal sequined little black dresses. It’s four pm yet it could be midnight in this dimly lit, stylish bar.
I feel a tad underdressed in the jeans and off-the-shoulder jumper I threw on this morning, but not as underdressed as the time my boobs burst loose. If the waiting staff recognise me, they’re too polite to mention it. Thank God for small mercies.
‘How did the seasonal shopping go?’ Savannah enquires over the rim of her wine glass.
‘I ordered Nate’s sisters each a bottle of the new Tom Ford fragrance, and our respective parents a fancy hamper from Brown Thomas filled with Chateau Montelena Cabernet Sauvignon and an array of other million calorie delicacies. They’re delivering everything gift-wrapped tomorrow, thank God. The baskets themselves are bigger than me.’
‘And what did you get the man himself?’ Ashley demands, shimmying forwards in her seat.
‘I got Nate a razor. I know it sounds utterly thoughtless, but it’s a bit of an in-joke that his stubble chafes me. Everywhere.’
‘You lucky bitch. Being “Single Sav” isn’t all it’s cracked up to be sometimes,’ Savannah sighs, blowing a strand of hair from her face.
‘Being in a “committed relationship”,’ Ashley uses her fingers to make air quotes, ‘isn’t all it’s cracked up to be sometimes either.’
I swirl my wine in my glass. This is the first time Savannah or Ashley have admitted their lives are lacking romantically. ‘Want me to ask Nate if he’s got any friends?’
‘God no!’ They eye each other with horror. ‘How is Nate, by the way?’ Savannah leans forwards to be heard over the rising chatter.
‘He’s waiting for me…’ My teeth nip my lower lip to halt the grin spreading across my face, ‘in bed.’
‘Well, he’s going to have to wait a bit longer! I need to make the most of you before you jet off to Hollywood.’ Savannah fluffs her hair with a grin.
Ashley motions for the waitress to bring us another bottle of Sancerre. Like we need one, we’ve had two already.
‘Girls, I should probably go.’ I grab my coat, ready to leave, but Ashley snatches it from my arms.
‘One more,’ Ashley pleads merrily. ‘Go on, it’s Christmas.’ She’s definitely not in head teacher mode today.
‘Okay, one more glass. None of us wants to be hungover for the wedding tomorrow.’ The urge to see Nate is consuming me.
I’ve got it bad.
Savannah’s mobile vibrates on the table and she squints at it for a second before sniggering. ‘Is it weird that I set up a google alert for your new boyfriend?’ She swipes the phone from the table, holding it up in front of her face. ‘Figured it would be a good way to keep track of you when you’re living the high life in Beverly Hills.’
She punches in the pin to her phone with wobbly fingers. ‘You know half the world is looking for Nate right now? Since his split from Celeste, he hasn’t been spotted once until yesterday. There were full-on conspiracy theories that he and Spike Hancock had gotten into a fistfight over Celeste before Spike buried his body in the Hollywood Hills. Others were speculating he’d hit the drugs again.’
‘Did anyone stop to consider he might have taken on a secret filming project?’ I blow a stray strand of hair out of my eyes. This is the exact type of speculation that Nate warned me about.
‘Maybe he’s been spotted again today. You might not be the only one doing some Christmas shopping!’ Ashley cocks her head and arches her eyebrows. ‘Wonder what he bought you?’
