Cradling a strong black coffee between my palms, I blow on it before taking a sip. Nate’s in a deep sleep for once. A break from ‘Hallmark hell’, as he calls it, seems to be agreeing with him. ‘Nate’s family is expecting us. He hasn’t been home in a while.’
‘So, you’re spending Christmas Day with his family?’ Savannah arches her perfectly plucked eyebrows.
‘Yeah. His parents are lovely. So warm. So openly affectionate. And they’re absolutely hilarious.’ I shrug, like it’s not the biggest deal in the world. ‘I still haven’t heard from mine since…’
I need to call my mother. I have to. But I keep putting it off. The shame is too fresh. I can’t carry the weight of hers too.
‘And then what?’ she probes, packing away the cereal boxes into an overhead cupboard.
‘Then… I’m going to America.’ I place my cup on the counter and wait for the onslaught.
‘You’re what?’ Ashley shrieks, choosing this moment to drag her tousled auburn hair into the kitchen.
‘To live with Nate.’ I roll my lips, anticipating the deluge.
Savannah fist pumps the air. ‘Wow! You go, girl!’
Her excitement is precisely what I need right now, because if I were to pause long enough to think about how quick things are moving and the consequences of being in a relationship with an A-list celebrity, my anxiety might just ruin me.
‘You know, I’ve always tried to do the right thing. The sensible thing. Like becoming a teacher because it’s a respectable profession, because it offers more security than selling paintings. Tying myself to a mortgage that’s probably too much for one person alone but struggling along anyway because getting on the property ladder young was something that was drummed into us since we were kids. These are great achievements, but they were my parents’ dreams, not mine.’
Savannah and Ashley nod in complete agreement.
‘This month here has really given me the chance to find myself. There were a few long days where the only company I had were my thoughts and my paintings. I know it sounds so cliché but away from the rat race of work and conforming to every little thing that’s expected of me, I had no choice but to face the truth – it’s a relief to be out of it.’
Savannah takes my hands and squeezes them. ‘I am going to miss you so much! But on the plus side,’ she side eyes Ashley, ‘visiting our bestie is a fantastic excuse to hop on a plane!’
‘God help America,’ a deep voice teases from behind us. Nate strides across the room wearing only a pair of tight boxer briefs.
No matter how many times I see his body, it never fails to take my breath away. The smooth planes of his stomach. The six symmetrical muscles above it. The perfect V that dips below his waistband and the fine wispy black trail following it. The ink sprawled across his rippling muscles.
‘Oh. My. God,’ Savannah whispers in my ear. ‘If he asks you to move to fucking Antarctica, go with him.’
My entire face flushes with heat, love, and longing all in one burst.
The girls step back, allowing Nate to step in. ‘Good morning, gorgeous.’ Strong hands grip my waist as his lips land on mine. He snatches them away again all too soon. ‘I’d dehydrate in that bed before it occurred to you to bringmea coffee.’ His sparkling green eyes twinkle at me mischievously.
I peep round his bicep to see Savannah and Ashley clinging to each other behind Nate’s back. A grin opens up on my face as my hands reach for Nate’s iron ass and squeeze.
‘And you pretend you’re shy!’ Savannah shrieks, cupping her mouth with her hand.
A giggle slips out of my mouth as I turn my attention back to Nate. ‘Go back to bed. I’ll bring you that coffee now.’ Chemistry sparks between us in an invisible short circuit.
‘Yes, ma’am.’ Nate offers a mock salute and presses another kiss on my lips before turning on his heels and exiting the kitchen just as swiftly as he arrived.
My cheeks ache from grinning like an idiot as I load a capsule into the coffee machine. I’ve got a feeling Nate could be drinking this one cold.
‘Oh my God!’ Savannah repeats like a broken record. ‘Your boyfriend is insanely hot, but the hottest thing about him is how much he adores you. Go live in America. Paint all day long and ride that celestial creature all night long.’ She makes a show of fanning herself and pretending to buckle at the knees. ‘It’s a good job my dads are still in bed because I think Nate in his underpants would be enough to make them both faint.’
By midday, all my things are packed in Nate’s rented Audi. Savannah kindly offered to drive my Mini back to Dublin to see what price the dealership will offer me for it.
Tootsie is in her element in the backseat, sitting up and sniffing the window. I hope she doesn’t pee on the leather interior.
My hand reaches into the handbag dangling from my left shoulder, searching for the only ornament I took from the Christmas tree, the bauble Nate gifted me. My fingers trace over the cool crystals and heat fires through my veins.
Outside Ard Na Mara, my friends and family linger at the doorway.
Tiny white snow drops flutter through the crisp air, a thin layer coating the ground beneath my feet. The ocean roars to my right, hissing and fizzing as it rolls back over the rocks.
