It plays out in slow motion before me.
But there’s nothing slow about my reaction.
My finger pulls the trigger. The bullet exits the chamber with a crack, flies across the room, and penetrates Doctor Dickhead’s shoulder. He crashes backwards against Victoria’s vanity station. A mirror resting on top of it wobbles and smashes onto his head. A million fragments of glass flicker against the thick crimson liquid pooling round him.
I’m on him before he can understand what’s happened.
He’s no match for me. Nor ever would be. It’s an abomination that he got close enough to find out, but I can’t allow myself to think about that right now.
‘It’s okay,Vic. Everything’s okay.’ With my knee on his chest, I pry the knife from his hand. Blood continues to pool around him. Not enough to be fatal, but enough to ensure he won’t be getting up anytime soon.
I pull my phone from my pocket and dial 999 for the second time in this bedroom. The operator assures me a patrol will be with us in under three minutes.
My eyes return to Victoria. Silent tears stream down her pale cheeks as she wriggles across the bed. I rip the tape from her mouth without lifting my knee from Doctor Dickhead’s chest. ‘You’re safe, sweetheart. You’re safe.’
She rocks upwards into a sitting position, teeth tearing at the tie around her wrists. ‘You seriously thought you’d get away with this?’ Her high-pitched yells are wild, like an animal caught in a trap.
A low, disturbing chuckle slips from Doctor Dickhead’s lips.
Dangerous creep. I use his own knife to cut Victoria’s hands free.
‘It was worth a try,’ he hisses from beneath me.
‘You’d throw your life away, all your years studying, just to hurt me?’ She gingerly rubs the chaffed skin on her wrists.
‘Not to hurt you. To have you.’ His eyes roam over her lasciviously even as the blood drains out of him. His attention returns to me. ‘Shoot me in the head. End this for good.’
It’s tempting. Oh, so tempting. But I’ve killed enough men in my time. And he’s no longer a threat. There’s no way he’ll be released. No chance on God’s green earth. And I narrowly missed charges for assaulting one doctor. I’m not prepared to go down for killing another.
Victoria stands on shaky legs, backing away from the bed towards the doorway. ‘You’re like a man who’s got nothing to lose.’
His eyes flutter closed. ‘You always were my brightest student.’
Their exchange means nothing to me.
Sirens wail in the distance. They get louder with each passing second. ‘Go and let them in. I’ll stay here.’ If they break down the door, I’ll have to find a replacement. Impossible at this hour of the night.
Victoria nods, glassy-eyed and trembling. I hate that he’s done this to her. I hate that I gave him the opportunity.
I might not have been two hundred miles away, but when it came to it, two hundred metres was too far.
I fucked up.
I’m ruined.
We’re both ruined.
There’s a reason why you’re not supposed to fuck the ward, let alone fall in love with them.
I can’t watch her back if I’m on my own. I did the unforgivable. I overestimated my own abilities. I’m fucking worse than Jared.
Victoria needs a man who can protect her.
That man clearly isn’t me.
She could have died because I bent the rules. Again.
The St. Christopher pendant scalds the skin around my neck. So much for serving as a reminder.
