He removes his hand and his mouth in the same second. The whimper that passes through my lips incites a smirk. I can’t see it, but I know it’s there.
‘Play for me,’ he insists again.
‘Play with me.’ I’m not referring to the guitar.
‘I will if you will.’ His suppressed laughter shakes through both of us.
‘Urgh. You are so annoying.’
‘You weren’t saying that ten seconds ago.’
‘Ten seconds ago you were making me feel all dizzy and delicious. Don’t tease me, it’s not fair. Especially when you’re leaving tonight.’
‘I told you, I’m not leaving you.’ He accentuates every word for effect.
Resting his palms over the back of my hands, he uses them to lift the instrument again, positioning it higher in my lap, balancing it against my middle. His right hand places my fingers over the strings, while his left slips back under my shirt, inching upwards again.
‘This is so unfair. It’s like sexual blackmail or something.’ I huff.
I can’t bring myself to play. I just can’t. It reminds me of all my broken hopes and dreams.
He circles my nipple again, long enough for my eyes to flutter close in sheer bliss, until he mischievously removes his fingers again.
‘Ryan!’ It’s practically a shriek.
‘Sasha.’
‘If you don’t stop teasing me now I’m going to spontaneously combust and it won’t be pretty.’
‘Baby, if you play a few little chords for me, I’ll make you “cum-bust” so deliciously hard, they’ll hear you all the way in Vegas.’
Lusty flutters ripple through my stomach.
I sigh, repositioning my fingers over the metal strings.
‘Good girl.’ His hand moves back to my breast, his lips on my neck and eventually I play out of fear of him ripping them away again. My physical need for this man overrides the fear of any emotion playing might unleash.
I begin to play the last melody we ever wrote together. Its every chord engrained into the rawest part of my memory. Ryan’s lips gently work over my neck as the music fills the room.
Closing my eyes, under the protection of Ryan’s embrace, I allow myself to feel everything for the first time in years.
The shock.
The loss.
The grief.
It’s nowhere near as raw as I anticipated.
And I know precisely the reason why.
He sits behind me, loving me, teasing me, torturing me in the most delicious fashion.
As I strum the final chords, a smile eclipses all other emotion. I did it! And ultimately, I enjoyed it! But not nearly as much as I’m going to enjoy what comes next.
Placing the guitar down on the coffee table, I spin round to straddle Ryan, who’s wearing a wistful grin.
‘Happy now?’ I wiggle on top of him, placing his other hand underneath my shirt in search of my reward.
