No. That’s ridiculous. I have a business to run. A child to raise. A home. A life.
Yes, but it was empty without him.
‘I guess at some point, we’ll have to iron things out, but for now, we’re just taking things one day at a time.’
Chloe huffs. ‘I see.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘Just don’t let him walk all over you this time…’ The implied suggestion that she’s not around to help pick up the pieces lingers in the air.
Just to say something positive I tell her he asked me to go to Vegas with him.
‘Oh my god! You have to go, Sash! Vegas is like the coolest place on the planet. And you’ve wanted to go to the States for years!’
‘Hello… you’re forgetting I have castle to run. And Victoria to mind. I know she’s nearly eighteen, but she’s way more innocent than you and I were at her age. I worry about her, you know...’
‘Pah! Speak for yourself. I was a virgin until nineteen years of age when James Doherty brought me out to Westport for the weekend to climb Croke Patrick. Needless to say, the mountain was not the only thing I climbed.’
‘Chloe! Seriously! Don’t make me tell you Ryan licked my…’
‘Ahhh! Enough! Okay.’ She visibly shudders and I snigger, delighted to get my own back for once.
‘Payback’s a bitch.’ I wink at her.
‘I can’t disagree. Especially when I’m not getting any at the moment. Things have run unseasonably dry in the desert lately.’ She shrugs.
‘Maybe you’ll pull a Christmas cracker when you come home, and it’ll be so explosive, you’ll end up staying here forever, and we’ll all live happily ever after…’ I sigh, blissfully.
A look of mock horror etches on to her neat, even features. ‘Have you been reading those crappy romance novels again?’
‘Sis, I’m a walking fucking romance novel at the minute. I should get a pen and start writing this shit down. It’ll be worth millions.’ My smile freezes on my face.
Fuck. Is that what Ryan’s doing? Using us to alleviate his writer’s block.
And if so, should I be horrified or flattered? I can’t decide, but I guess it depends on the outcome of our relationship.
Old habits die hard. He promised he’d never leave me again. For frig’s sake, the man swore blind he was going to marry me. Ok, so it wasn’t an actual proposal, but he did lay his cards out in front of me. Perhaps I haven’t fully learnt to trust him again yet after all.
Chloe mistakes my sudden silence for something else.
‘I’m so sorry I’m not there to help. If I was, you might have some hope of going to Vegas. Signing off on the final contract of the year is taking longer than I hoped. Worst-case scenario I’ll be back the twenty-second. There’s no way I’m going to miss the ball.’
I offer her a distracted smile.
‘And don’t worry about Vic, she’s fine. She might be a little naive for her age but that’s what happens when you live in a castle and attend a private all-girls school. She’s probably waiting for a handsome prince to ask for her hand in marriage before she goes on a date. Just be grateful she’s not veering the other way. Then you’d really have something to worry about.’
She’s right. I know she is. And even though I’d love to go to Vegas, it’s simply not practical. If Ryan and I are serious, I’m sure there will be other opportunities.
Life is good. Scratch that. Life is fucking fantastic.
‘Can’t wait to see you,’ I tell my sister, honestly.
‘You too. I’m sorry I left it so long.’ Her sombre expression turns to one of immediate excitement and she leans closer to the phone. ‘I would say I don’t want you to go to any trouble for my arrival, but you know it’s not true! I’m expecting the full Irish welcome; the food, the drink, the Christmas lights! All the traditions that get utterly overlooked in this strange, empty city! Let’s go all out. Maybe lover-boy will bring us all back to the Christmas markets? It’s been years since we ice skated!’ Her blue eyes positively shine at the prospect.
I stifle the laughter as it erupts from my mouth. ‘Sure. I’ll see what I can do. Either way, it’s going to be the best Christmas ever.’ Even if Ryan isn’t here to share it with me. As an afterthought I find myself asking, ‘Chloe, did you ever listen to Ryan’s songs?’
‘Duh. Who didn’t? Other than you, I mean?’ She rolls her eyes at me.
