‘Yes. It’s been ten years. I’ll barely know anyone there.’
I’m under no illusion Sasha will be there. She’s probably married with kids by now. She always wanted to be a mother. Did she study music at college? Or did she veer in a more academic direction, like her father hoped?
I need to stop thinking about her. Obsessing about Sasha. It’s not healthy. Going back is one thing. Going down a long overgrown rabbit hole is an entirely different matter. We’ve both moved on.
Except maybe I haven’t.
‘You’re due to perform in Vegas in the middle of December.’ Jayden enunciates every word as if I’m eight, not twenty-eight.
‘No fucking shit, Sherlock.’ I roll my eyes at him. ‘That is exactly why it’s imperative I get the fuck out of here and get some work done in preparation.’
He shoves a hand through his hair for what seems like the hundredth time. ‘Do you want me to come with you?’ His tone is weighted with a reluctance, suggesting he’d rather walk the fucking plank.
Thankfully, I feel the same.
‘No, I don’t. The whole point is to get away. To find myself. The last thing I want is company. Bad enough Pierce has to come.’ I shoot a look towards the doorway in time to see my burly bodyguard, hovering pensively. ‘Sorry, Pierce, no offence. It’s just hard to think straight in permanent company.’
‘You won’t even know I’m there.’ Pierce crosses his enormous, muscular arms over his chest and nods once before continuing down the corridor.
Jayden’s face is scrunched up as though he’s in pain. ‘Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you? My schedule is pretty flexible – most of my other signings are behaving themselves.’ He shoots me another glare.
Mocking him, I click my fingers like I’ve just remembered her name, biting back the smirk threatening my lips. ‘Does this have anything to do with that girl you used to bang? Jacinta? Or Janine?’
‘Don’t be fucking ridiculous,’ he huffs.
‘Well, now you know how I feel. Stop fussing and let me get on with what I have to do.’ I slam the suitcase closed and lock it, fiddling to set the code.
‘The difference is, little brother, I was never in love with Jacinta. You, on the other hand, spent years mooning over Sasha Sexton.’
‘Oh, now you remember her name? Besides, there’s an embarrassingly large number of women in LA who would beg to differ.’
‘Really? Remind me again how many of those women you used those three life-changing little words on again? Or how many of those women you composed song after song about?’ He stops pacing, long enough to tower in front of me.
‘Whatever, Jayden. You’ll be smiling all the way to the bank when I come back with enough songs to fill ten new albums.’
‘You really think that’s gonna be the case?’ He takes a step backwards to scrutinise my face. I’ve never been able to lie to him. We’ve always been close. Mam left when we were toddlers and, before he left us, Dad worked every hour god sent to provide for us, though definitely not as honourably as we’d have liked.
‘Why else would I go back to Ireland at the start of the coldest season of the year?’
I amble out into the hallway and down the marble circular staircase, with Jayden tight at my heels.
‘Just be careful, ok?’ Not exactly the affectionate type, Jayden slaps my back in a manly gesture.
‘Gee, maybe there’s a heart in that chest of yours, after all.’ Though none of the women in this city would concur. I might be a love-them-and-leave-them type, but I least I do it with honesty and a kind smile. Jayden’s always been the treat-them-mean type.
‘Whatever. Call me if you need me.’ He strides purposefully towards the front door.
‘Will do. Try not to break any more hearts this week.’ I loiter in the doorway as he marches over my paving.
‘We all have our talents.’ He opens the door to his shiny new Mercedes SLK, shouting over his shoulder as an afterthought, ‘Can I borrow your Ferrari while you’re gone?’
‘Not a fucking chance. Buy your own.’
He sniggers and offers me his middle finger as a parting gesture. ‘Write that fucking album and I might just do that.’
That’s the whole idea.
I only hope it’s a good one, because if it turns out not to be, I don’t have a whole heap of others.
