‘You better believe I can. If I am going to even contemplate suffering that man under my roof, he’s damn well going to pay the price for it.’
A snort of laughter bursts from my best friend. ‘He’ll know you did it deliberately.’
‘I don’t care.’ More like, I wish I didn’t care. The thought of seeing him again in the flesh after all these years, literally turns me into a brandy-drinking quivering mess.
He was everything to me, once upon a time. When he left, he took a part of me with him. He scarred my soul with a wound so deep, I’ve never been able to let anyone else get near me for fear they’ll do the same.
Even Conor Riley, my gorgeous head chef. He’s the only other man I’ve ever secretly contemplated getting close to after Ryan. And even at that – it’s been years and I’m still contemplating, no further forward than when he first started at the castle. Three years older than me, he joined us straight after he graduated, ten months after my parents passed.
‘What if it puts him off and we lose his business?’
It’s no coincidence he booked into my castle.
‘It won’t, trust me. It’s pittance to him. If he’s booked this place, it’s because he wants to come back.’
Why though?
From the look of it – and believe me when I say I try not to – it appears he’s living the high life in the States. Each glossy photo plastered front page of the tabloids boasts a different singer or actress on his arm.
My stomach churns.
‘Why would he come back now? After all these years?’ Megan’s thoughts mirror my own.
‘No idea.’
She bites her lip thoughtfully. ‘You know, the gossip rags are claiming he has writer’s block.’ She takes a sip from her glass to avoid looking at me. She’s the only one who knows what Ryan and I had. That we used to spend hours composing songs together. So many times she’s hinted half the songs on his album were basically written by me. I wouldn’t know, I could never bring myself to listen to them.
She stands and stalks towards the phone. ‘You know what, I’d call it compensation for smashing your heart into a trillion pieces. Eight grand a night’s a bargain!’ She winks as she relays the message to Louise.
I sip my drink and wait for my shaking hands to steady.
Ten minutes later, the phone rings. It can only be reception calling back. Perhaps Mr Flash-Ass isn’t prepared to put his money where his mouth is after all.
‘Everything ok?’ I ask.
‘Yes, I just wanted to confirm that the new price was fine for our, erm… special guest. Also he booked an extra room – a deluxe suite with sea views for his, erm, companion. I took the liberty of adding a fifty per cent increase on to our usual price, I hope that’s ok?’
I should be delighted. It’s a huge boost for the castle. Yet, the thought of Ryan and his ‘companion’ makes me violently nauseous. Bad enough he’s coming back, but to bring a woman with him too. It maims like a rusty dagger.
‘Great initiative, Louise. You’ve just earned yourself a bonus. Thank you.’
Megan rolls her eyes, having overheard the entire exchange. ‘Companion! Pah! What a tosser! It’ll be weird, you know, seeing him after all these years.’
‘You’re telling me.’ It’s the understatement of the century.
‘Does Victoria know you used to date him?’ Megan glances at Victoria’s closed bedroom door.
‘Yeah, Ryan used to chase her round and play tag with her. She used to adore him. Funny, she never brings it up now.’
As young as she is, she seems to know it hurts. It’s safely in the firmly taped box of ‘we don’t discuss’ – along withthatnight, and everything else that might rip open any other barely closed wounds.
‘Is she still seeing the counsellor?’ Megan’s voice drops to a hushed whisper even though it’s only the two of us here.
‘Yeah. It seems to help.’
I could probably do with a few sessions myself, though I don’t need a professional to tell me why I can’t let anyone get close to me.
‘I know it’s less than ideal, but maybe this is exactly what Huxley Castle needs, you know, some excitement. Ryan’s arrival will certainly put us back on the map.’
