Searcy, Arkansas
March 2012
Taylor could hear people talking, but it felt like they were a long way away from her. It was very dark where she was, and no matter how hard she tried, she could not open her eyes. It was so peaceful where she was. She did not want to leave it, yet she somehow sensed she had to.
Very slowly, she forced her eyes open, and the first thing she saw was Greer's face. He was leaning over her, frowning. Still, she was again struck by how beautiful he was. She felt the fingers of attraction clawing at her even as she was still in pain. She opened her mouth to speak, and another pain squeezed her chest, causing her to moan once again, "Oh." She closed her eyes again and tried to reach back for the sweet oblivion of the darkness.
"TJ, open your eyes. It's Greer. You're fine. You are just having another panic attack. Remember, like the last time. Just stay with me. You're doing great."
Slowly, Taylor reopened her eyes and tried to focus on what Greer was saying. After a few moments, she said, "Just another panic attack. Are you sure?"
"Yes, Dr. Payne is also here. She is going to check you out to make sure. I am going to talk to my aunt, but I will be right back. Don't worry. You are okay." Greer excused himself and went in search of Edna.
Taylor's regular doctor examined her for the next several moments and concluded that Greer had been correct. Taylor was probably just having another panic attack. The doctor gave her a shot to calm her nerves and offered to write her prescriptions for anxiety medications. Taylor explained that she already had prescriptions at home but had just not filled them because she did not believe she needed them. The doctor suggested that Taylor consider filling them as a precautionary measure. She also made sure that Taylor had a ride home to rest. Confident that Taylor would be okay, Dr. Payne excused herself and returned to the gala. Thankfully, Greer came back into the room a few minutes later.
"Well, you were right," Taylor told him hesitantly. "It was just another panic attack."
"Yeah, I know. I talked to Dr. Payne before I came back in." While he was being kind, Taylor could feel that things between them had turned cold.
Looking up at him, Taylor asked, "Where is everybody else?"
“Well, if you mean your husband," Taylor did not miss the sarcasm in his voice, "he carried you in here. But then, Poppy got upset about something, and he took off. He ran after her, but only after I promised to take care of you. There is a lot going on here, isn't there?"
Taylor sat up enough to see where she was. She was lying on a couch in the library. The irony of her being brought into this room was not lost on Taylor, even as her chest continued to spasm. She nodded and said, "More than you can imagine." Even though Greer was being nice, Taylor could tell he had become distant and was treating her much differently than he had the night before. Heseemed angry. He definitely had a right to be. Not only had she run out on him this morning, but she had lied to him about so many things.
Wanting to keep things light, she asked, "What about Joules and Johnna and all the others?"
"Joules is outside getting the car ready. She is dying to get in here, but I asked for a few more minutes with you before she takes you home." Giving a little sad laugh, he added, "My poor, old Aunt Edna nearly had a stroke when you collapsed. We all did. I'll say this for you. You definitely know how to make an entrance."
"What about the gala? I hope my fainting didn't affect the auction. The hospital counts on the money raised each year to keep many good programs going."
"No worries. No one in the main ballroom ever even knew something happened. It has gone on as planned, and from the looks of the bids, it is going very well."
"Well, at least that is good." Sighing, Taylor added, "I guess you have figured everything out by now? I mean about my being…married to Bennett. And, about him and Poppy?"
"No, not really. My aunt clued me in on some of it. I figured out most of the rest of it, but I am struggling with why you lied to me."
Giving her a hurt look, Greer added, "You're married. Why did you let me think you were divorced? I realize now that you never said you were single, but you let me think that. I sat there and told you all about my marriage and about Christine, and you never once said a word about being married. Then, when you said you had not been with anyone in almost two years, I assumed you had been single that long. You let me assume that. Why?"
Sighing deeply, Taylor said, "You're right. I am still married, but it is only a technicality. I was telling the truth when I said I hadn't been with anyone for that long." Trying to make him understand, she continued, "My marriage has been dying slowly for a long timenow. I just refused to deal with it. And then, I had to, and I didn't know how. So, I just lost it. I ran away to the beach to think and stumbled across your path. The bottom line is that my marriage is over. We are getting a divorce as soon as possible. Bennett is in love with Poppy and wants to be with her."
"If all that is true, why didn't you just tell me? I was honest with you about the mistakes I made in my marriage. Did you think I would judge you for the ones in yours?”
"Last night was amazing. I felt something real for the first time in a really long time. I thought we connected and that it meant something. I woke up feeling great. I went out to get some food to make breakfast, but when I came back, you were gone. You ran out without so much as a note. I realized then that it hadn't meant as much to you as it had me."
Taylor hung her head and was silent for a moment. When she looked back up at Greer, she looked earnestly into his eyes and tried to make him understand. “I felt very connected to you, too. I would have never been with you if I hadn't. I know that now. I'm sorry for running out. That was wrong. I didn't know how to do this, and I panicked. I have never cheated before, and guilt and shame threatened to overwhelm me. Plus, I was very hung over. I just had to get out of there. Please forgive me."
Greer was silent for a moment and then said, "I don't know. I will have to think about it. In the meantime, we need to get you home. Joules has the car ready." Greer helped Taylor out to the car. They used the same side door that Joules had gone out of earlier and Taylor was able to get in the car without being seen. Once safely in the car, Taylor looked up at Greer and asked, "So, will I ever see you again?"
Greer gave a half smile and said, "I don't know, Darling. Do you want to?” There was that darlin’ again. Hearing him say that melted her heart.
She smiled shyly and replied, "Yes, once this mess I am in the middle of is cleaned up and done with, I would love to see you again."
Greer smiled and said, "Well then, I guess the ball is in your court. Until then, please, TJ, get your prescriptions filled and take care of yourself." With that, Greer lightly grazed her lips with his before shutting the car door and walking away.
As they drove away, Joules looked at Taylor and said, "How are you feeling? You scared the bejesus out of all of us back there."
"I know. I am sorry. I am feeling much better. That shot that Dr. Payne gave me is starting to work." Taylor relaxed her head on the headrest and closed her eyes as Joules drove.
