Then, holding back a sob, Taylor realized something that she had not before this moment. The missing father in all of the photos and paintings was Bennett. Intellectually, she realized it, but emotionally, she was processing what it all meant. Taylor quietly asked, "Oh my, do you think that is why she painted them? So he could know and share in the child's growing up? Or does he already have some other painting hidden away somewhere? Was he therethe whole time? Is that why the father was never shown? Oh God, how long has this been going on? Were they both mocking me behind my back because I was just some stupid woman who blindly trusted her husband? They must think I'm the biggest fool ever." Taylor was full-out sobbing by the time she finished talking.
Joules immediately tried to comfort her friend, "No, stop that. It was never like that. I can't go into this with you. I have already told Bennett, and I am telling you. I am not getting into the middle of this any more than I already am. I will tell you this. It is not what you think. They have not been carrying on behind your back all of these years. Bennett did not even know he had a son until very recently. You know what a good and kind man he is. Bennett would never abandon someone he loved, especially not his child. If he could do that, you would have never married him, and I would have never worked so damn hard to get him elected or to keep him in office. That is all I am going to say on the subject.”
"When you are ready to talk to Bennett, call him. He will tell you everything you need to know. Until then, what I want you to know is this. To kill the story, Bennett had to promise Edna Stone that you and he would both attend the gala as a couple."
Taylor flinched as if she had been slapped, "No! No! No! No way, I am not walking back into that club with him ever. I mean it, Joules. You need to make that clear."
Joules said, "Listen, you must calm down and think about this rationally. Edna is afraid the bad publicity from the story could reduce the amount of money the gala will raise. You know she will not let anything stand in the way of funds for that hospital. After the hospital gala, you two can quietly divorce."
"Divorce?" Taylor croaked. "Bennett told you he wants to divorce me? If so, that might be something he wants to discuss with me before he starts sharing it with Edna Stone!"
"That was a bad choice of words. I meant that you two need to get through the gala and decide what the future holds for both of you. I didn't mean to upset you even more," Joules began apologizing. "Oh, TJ, I am so sorry; I would never do anything to hurt you. You know that, right? Everything is just so crazy right now. I, I…" Realizing she was unsure what to say next, Joules's words faltered.
Neither woman spoke for several seconds. Taylor had never heard Joules at a loss for words before. Well, good! Joules had just left her a little speechless, too. No decisions had been made yet. At least none she knew about.
The fact that Taylor herself had come to the conclusion that her marriage was over the day before seemed momentarily forgotten. It was one thing to be the person who wanted the divorce. It was something else to be the person being divorced.
Taylor wanted to be the one to walk away from Bennett. Not the other way around. It was probably silly and childish, but she didn't care. They would be getting a divorce when and if she said so. Not Bennett. He had lost that right yesterday in the middle of the Searcy Country Club. She prayed he had not discussed their marriage with Edna Stone. That would add insult to injury.
After several more minutes of awkward silence, Joules said, "TJ, say something. I am sorry. I am a complete jerk."
After a moment, Taylor said, "It's okay. I am not upset with you. But, it is all so overwhelming."
"I know it is. And, for what it is worth, I am doing all I can not to take Bennett out back and shoot him with my granddaddy's old hunting rifle. If I did not know him the way I do, I would have already done it. But there is more here that needs to be unpacked before shots start being fired."
Despite herself, Taylor half laughed, half sobbed. "Well, the thought of shooting Bennett does sound appealing, but you areright. Killing him is not the answer. At least not yet. I need time to think of a good alibi for both of us."
"So true," agreed Joules, "But seriously, now is the time to think about what you want and where you want your life to go from here. We both know neither you nor Bennett have been happy for a very long time. Maybe it is time to stop and do some hard soul-searching about your life. No matter what that is, I am here for you."
Before Taylor could respond, Joules added, "I have to go now. Another big pow-wow with the Anderson campaign is about to start.”
"Anderson campaign? Does that mean Bennett is still planning on running? Is he crazy? This is all going to come out," said Taylor.
Not wanting to address her friend’s questions and worried Taylor would ask her more questions she was not prepared to answer, Joules said, "Love you and talk soon." The line instantly went dead.
Taylor was stunned. How could her friend leave her hanging like that? Turning her phone on silent, Taylor threw herself back against her pillows and literally growled out loud.
Taylor had mixed emotions about the story not being released. It would give her a few days of peace. On the other hand, she knew she would worry every day until it was all out. And eventually, it would come out. At least they had some lead time to put a good spin on it. But no amount of spin was going to change the fact that Bennett cheated on her in public, and half the club saw it. Oh, Edna might be able to keep everyone from talking because of the gala. But, once they separated or divorced, Taylor was pretty sure every one of those old ladies would be talking. At the moment, all she wanted to do was go back to bed and pull the covers over her head for at least two days. So, that was pretty much what happened.
She did, however, take a long hot shower first. It had been less than twenty-four hours since she had showered, but it felt like sixdays. Once clean, she pulled on one of her new PJ sets and wandered into the kitchen for food. All she had was the leftover junk food from the late-night pharmacy run. Deciding she wasn't starving, she fixed herself a large drink and returned to bed.
She spent most of that day lying in bed, watching reruns of sappy romantic movies. She'd cried and laughed at the appropriate times even though her mind wasn't even on the movie. She was operating on autopilot. Her big effort of the day had just been breathing. Several times during the day, she would think about her life when a scene would spark some memory of her life with Bennett. Then, she would truly lose her ability to breathe. Gasping for air and feeling overwhelmed, she would fight to calm herself down by telling herself everything would be okay. When those moments came, she would count to ten and focus solely on breathing. For the most part, it worked, and she survived the day. Though she tried to avoid it, she could not stop thinking about Bennett and the life they had built together over the last ten years. Had all of it been a sham? Had any of it really meant anything?
Taylor was as confused by her situation as she was overwhelmed by it. She had known her marriage had problems. No question. A wife in a great marriage doesn't avoid her husband's calls for days if everything is hunky dory. But, she honestly never saw either one cheating on the other. They had been friends since childhood.
She couldn't remember a time when Bennett hadn't been in her life. Her earliest memories included Bennett, Tatum, and her. Remembering treasured moments left her weepy and sad, yet oddly comforted, as if Tatum was there with her, trying to help her through this. She had gone months without thinking of her brother, and today, he seemed to be a part of every memory her mind was determined for her to remember.
God, how she missed him. Her big brother, her protector. If he were here now, she had no doubt Bennett would be sporting ahuge black eye and maybe a broken nose. Catching herself, she was shocked at how violent her thoughts had become so quickly. She avoided violence of any kind. It surprised her and showed her how hurt she really was that her mind went there so quickly.
Pushing all thoughts of black eyes and broken noses out of her mind, Taylor lay back on her pillows and let her mind wander back over the early years with Bennett and Tatum. More times than she cared to admit, it was actually Bennett who had come running to her rescue. Any time Taylor needed something done or fixed, Bennett was there for her. She had never questioned why until that moment. The three of them didn't hang out as much as the boys got older. Oh, Bennett was always still around, but he and Tatum were more in their own little worlds. They played sports and had girlfriends.
Taylor remembered them getting their first cars. To this day, this memory is still one of Taylor's favorites. She remembered watching Bennett and Tatum climbing into their shiny new Jeeps, laughing, and being excited. Tatum had been so alive. So full of joy. It was hard to believe it had been almost twenty years since that day. Oh how her life had changed since then.
Thinking about the Bennett of her childhood, compared to the Bennett she married, she realized the carefree, joyous boy in him had died right along with the death of his best friend. Or so she had thought at the time. Now, she wondered if something else might have so greatly affected him. Given his son's age, Bennett and Poppy must have been involved. Maybe it was because of her that Bennett was so sad and lost.
Certainly, for Taylor, the loss of so many people that she loved had cut her to the bone. Thinking about all she had lost, the tears began to flow freely again. As the day turned into night, Taylor realized that she had not made any big decisions about her life, but she had begun the process of taking her life apart one piece at atime. Hopefully, doing so would allow her to find a way to put it all back together again.
Taylor spent the rest of that day and the next holed up in the cottage. She had very little appetite, but given that she had already drunk her way through the two bottles of wine she bought and two more she found in the wine cabinet beneath the wet bar, she decided she needed a little food with her wine, other than chips and chocolate. Still dressed in the pajamas from two days before, Taylor scavenged through the kitchen cabinets to find several menus for local restaurants that delivered. She ordered food at least once daily and forced herself to eat at least a few bites before diving head-first into yet another bottle of wine and a vat of self-pity.
