A beat passes that feels like an eternity.Her lips part in a silent plea, while her green eyes widen and glass over with what could be tears.I edge through Dot and Marnie, desperate to be close to her, to touch her, to know that she’s real.Only I can’t decide what that touch will be—a strong shove out the door or a firm pull into my arms.
Fuck me.
“Henry, breathe,” she says.“Breathe.”
That’s when I realize I’m wheezing.Badly.
“Holy shit, dude,” Dot exclaims.“Chill.”
“Where’s your inhaler?”Marnie asks.
I fumble in my pocket as Dot eases me into a chair.I take a quick inhale, but relief is minimal.My lungs have tightened to the size of raisins, as if she’s vacuum-sealed the air right out of me.
“Not… you,” I rasp, sounding angrier than I want.“It was not supposed to be you.”
“I-I-I didn’t know.”Her voice trembles with distress.“I’m sorry, Henry.It was a mistake.I won’t—it won’t—I’m sorry.”
Her eyes circle from Dot to Marnie.“I’m sorry,” she tells them, too.
Then, she turns and bolts from the building.
“Do I need to call nine-one-one?”Marnie asks, phone poised.
“Hop in the van,” Dot counters.“I’ll have you at the hospital before you can sayawkwardest reunion ever.”
I hold up my hand in protest.“I’ll… be… fine.”Another draw on my inhaler slows my breathing and opens my lungs just enough.I need to slow down.To focus.To relax.
But part of me begs to run after her, lungs be damned.
“I apologize, Henry,” Marnie says.“Dr.Blake told mehe’dinstall the garden.We touched base yesterday when the other supplies arrived—he said nothing about Venus.”
“So, that’s Venus, huh?”Dot grins.“You must be nursing some serious wounds to hate her that much.”
“I don’t… hate her.”
“He just never wants to see her again,” Marnie finishes for me.
Dot peeks out of the open front door.“She’s gone, just peeled off in a classic Land Rover.”
“I expected her to be more… villainous,” Marnie says.“She seemed sad.Definitely surprised.I’d better text Ivy and let her know what happened.Dr.Blake must’ve arranged this.”
Dot laughs.“He parent-trapped you two.Hmm, that’s not right.Love-trapped?”
Damn.She probably expected to meet a stranger and install a garden as a favor to her dad.The place looks so different now that I doubt she remembers coming here with me to visit Uncle Jay.
I’m only grateful that Olly already left with Carly and didn’t witness this.How would I have explained falling apart over the woman I’ve only revered in his eyes?
I hate this.
Even worse, I hate what I said.Not you.It wasn’t supposed to be you.Fuck.Whenever I imagined seeing Venus again and delivering all the words I never got the chance to say, I failed to consider that my faulty body might prevent me from saying much of anything.Questions I should’ve asked bombard me.Starting withwhy?Why she left?Why she leftme?Why she made promises she didn’t keep?
“So, what’s the story with this girl, eh?”Dot asks, grabbing a bag of Cheetos from her pocket.
“She was my best friend,” I say, still gasping slightly.“Then, my girlfriend.We were headed to UNC-Chapel Hill together.Then, one night, I saved her life.She saved mine.She told me she loved me, promised me prom.She left the country instead.Ghosted me.”
“Yikes, that’s rough.”Dot tilts the bag in my direction.“Cheeto?”
“No, thanks,” I sputter.
