Chapter 1
Riggs
Iwas enjoying a well-deserved bubble bath when I heard Alanna cry.
It wasn’t the sound of her crying that was unusual. It was how close she sounded to my bathroom. She and her aunt, my mate, were currently staying at the Bear Clan Lodge, but at the opposite end.
Alanna was barely four months old, and she had already lost her mom. Her mother had given Piper custody of her and then disappeared, hoping to lead her mate away from the baby. It had bought them some time, but Piper later found out her sister had been killed.
There was a visceral ache in my heart for my mate, for her grief and for how alone she must be feeling right now. She was carrying more than anyone should have to at once. She had been discharged from the military after receiving full custody of Alanna, and on top of that she was grieving her sister, constantly looking over her shoulder, and trying to process the fact that I was her mate. It was a crushing amount for one person.
I wanted to help her shoulder it, but she kept me at arm’s length, so I did what I could without pushing. At the very least, I was grateful I could give her and Alanna a safe place to rest fora while. I was also quietly working to find Barrett and see him handled, though I hadn’t told Piper that yet.
I had only just found her. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her.
I had searched for my mate for years, and as time passed without finding her, I had slowly begun to lose hope. Then one evening, Everly, Alaric’s mate, returned to the Lodge with Piper and Alanna. They had simply appeared while Alaric and I were waiting up for Everly.
The moment I saw Piper, I felt it. The searing in my blood, the ringing in my bones, the bright, effervescent surge in my chest that every shifter knew when they found their mate.
And she wasbreathtaking.
She was also exhausted, haunted, hunted, and afraid, even if she did her best to conceal it.
But she was mine.
And I knew.
The baby’s wails grew louder, sharper now, and I frowned. She sounded thoroughly unhappy with life at the moment. She also sounded very close to my bedroom door.
Piper had been keeping to her side of the Lodge these last few weeks, and I knew it was in an effort to avoid running into me. I tried not to let that sting, reminding myself that she was already drowning in responsibilities and grief, but sometimes the darker thoughts slipped through anyway. The ones that whispered she didn’t wantme. That something inmewas lacking. That she would never choose this bond, no matter what fate or a higher power had decided.
I pushed those thoughts down every time they surfaced, but my bear and I were both aching, and it was difficult to hide.
Uneasy now, I stepped out of the bath and shrugged into a blue cotton robe, cinching it closed before opening the bathroom door. I paused at my bedroom door, listening carefully.
It truly sounded as though Alanna was right outside.
Alarm shot through me, and I opened the door too quickly. Alanna, sitting directly beside it in her baby carrier, startled, blinking rapidly before launching into even louder cries.
I winced, guilt tightening in my chest at having frightened her.
I scanned the hallway, but Piper was nowhere in sight, and neither was anyone else. With no other choice, I crouched down and unbuckled her from the carrier, lifting her as carefully as if she were made of spun glass.
I had never held a baby before, and I was painfully aware of how large I was compared to her small, delicate frame. The thought of hurting her, even accidentally, made my hands feel clumsy and oversized.
Alanna stopped crying for a moment, blinking up at me with hiccuping breaths.
I looked at her, she looked at me, then she began wailing again.
Honestly, I couldn’t blame her, but panic surged through me all the same.
What was I supposed to do with her?
Still holding her awkwardly at arm’s length, as though she might detonate without warning, I made my way through the Lodge in search of help. Preferably one of the women, since most of the Clan males would be just as useless as I was. A father might suffice. Or Matteo. Matteo carried a wisdom beyond his years, and I clung to the hope that it extended to infants as well.
“Hello?” I called. “Is anyone home?”
Most of my Clan worked in Moonhaven. Some worked from Clan property or from home, but not many. A rare few didn’t need to work at all and kept themselves busy supporting the Clan. Still, someone should have been here. Mathan and Alistair, at the very least.
