Everyone knew they were married, or Max assumed they did. Rick wasn't exactly quiet on the matter. Still, tentacles around them curled in distress and Percy seemed to lose about half his height.
“This is the time to honor you, Rick husband,” Max said loudly. “You are the great thinker who created the shield toprotect your planet. You are the great thinker who found a new program to navigate space. You are the father of three precocious children who are all brilliant and so different,” Max added the last part since he knew how much Rick valued his children's individuality. But no matter what he said, the feeling of joy had abandoned the room. Instead there was only awkwardness and silence and Percy with his enormous eye pointed straight at them.
Kohei twitched and pressed closer to them, and Max wondered if they were in actual danger after insulting their hosts.
The silence dragged, broken only by the soft bubbling of the aquariums audible only because of how still the rest of the room had grown. Slowly, Percy's walking tentacle straightened. “Two.” he echoed Rick. “We honor two who forced the outsiders to recognize our nature, but mostly we honor the one who provides great feats of engineering to protect us and our offspring and our offspring's offspring and their offspring for many generations to come. We mostly honor one whose great thinking allows us to confront the storm and the predator.” His voice was louder than ever, and the spinning started again. Rick must have accepted that compromise, because he tightened his tentacles around Max and slowly twirled them.
Max held out a hand towards Kohei, but his son didn’t take it. Kohei watched while Rick and Max twirled, first slowly then faster and faster until Max’s feet could no longer keep up. Rick curled a tentacle around the back of Max’s knees and swept him up before twirling him around like a child at a carnival game.
Max laughed with wild delight, confident in his husband's strength, even if he was not sure about what the hell was going on with politics on Hidden planet.
Chapter Eleven
“Home sweet home,” Max said as they walked through the shadow created by the overhead garage lights and the alien ships. More alien than Hidden one alien ships. At some point, Max had stopped thinking of the Hidden ones as aliens, but all other aliens were still alieny.
“Sweet home Alabama,” Rick added as they approached the hull.
“Do you even know what Alabama is?”
“Geographical area defined by banjos,” Rick answered.
Having his family learn about Earth through television was reinforcing some stereotypes. Max might have corrected Rick's assumptions, but the ship’s hatch was sliding open.
“There you two are,” Dee said. “Do none of you know how to work a radio?”
“I don't know how to work a Hidden one radio, and I don’t have one,” Max said.
Dee crossed her arms and turned her glare onto Rick and Kohei. “That gets one of you off the hook. Would you two like to explain why you didn't call to tell us what was going on? It’s a little disconcerting to be on a ship while it’s getting dragged underground.” She gestured at the massive cavern occupied by a dozen ships of different designs.
Xander hurried past Dee, his tentacles waving with excitement. “Many many storms. I informed Dee that storms do much damage, so ships are shielded underground.”
“That explains the giant garage.”
James appeared at the top of the ramp, but instead of racing toward them as Xander had, he stood next to Dee. “Hidden ones dislike outsiders,” he said in the universe’s biggest understatement. “They offer outsiders inferior land for trading.”
“I said that,” Xander trumpeted. “Storms. Many big storms. Trading city is on storm path of Executioner Sea. No one wanted land until outsiders came.”
“Hidden ones still dislike land,” James said. “But they seek profits. Now that Rick Father and Max Father have returned, I will go to city and sell many, many, many weapons.”
Xander blew raspberries, and Rick’s tentacles curled a little at their children's blatant disrespect of each other. “Hidden ones eschew weapons, prefer hiding.” Xander’s tone made it clear that he thought James was an idiot.
“Outsiders are at spaceport. Hidden ones cannot hide from all outsiders. The time required to evacuate Trading city would negate the value of hiding. They need weapons,” James trumpeted back.
“Can we avoid triggering any arms races?”
Max expected a protest from Rick, but he did not expect the bellow of unhappiness. “James offspring is foolish and shortsighted, but he will make foolish and shortsighted decisions of his own and we will respect,” Rick exploded.
Max stared at his husband, and even the children were shocked into silence, which was not easy to do with their kids.
Rick slowly rotated until the last of his tentacles was free from Max’s hold, and he rushed the ship’s gangplank as fast as his undulating walking tentacle could carry him. “I require time for working.” James and Dee scrambled out of his way as Rick charged past.
Dee looked at Max, but all he could do was shrug. Was his husband in a foul mood? Yes. Was his husband being weird? Again, yes. But Max had no explanations. And given the generalstate of confusion amongst his children, he had to assume this wasn’t some cultural misunderstanding. Rick was genuinely being weird.
Max rested a hand on Xander's waist or at least the section of his bulbous head right below the last of his eyes and right above where his body spread out to accommodate tentacles. “Let's go back inside.” He pushed Xander toward the ramp.
“I will sell weapons. Many weapons. Useful weapons. Weapons with high profit margin.”
They had created a monster. “Maybe you can create your global arms conglomerate later. Right now I would like the whole family to sit and talk about what's going on in the city versus what you guys may have found out in the spaceport.” Max knew his children, and they had not been sitting quietly in the ship while waiting for Max and Rick to return.
