“I was well into puberty by the time I hit thirteen. And as the adolescent in question, I maintain that having inappropriate crushes on older figures is perfectly normal. Healthy even. A person could argue that crushing on you was the last psychologically healthy thing I did.”
“Say what you want, having sex that young is wrong.”
“I won’t argue that. However, my twisted fantasies were fantasies. I’ve never had a partner other than my right hand with an occasional awkward and tawdry affair with my left. You had a sire who graded you on sex, which is the least sexy form of voyeurism I have ever heard of in my life. Do you have any idea how deeply disturbing it is that the Army has a report on file about that?”
“Ironically, yes I do. So now you see why I prefer to avoid sex.”
“Well, if we have sex, I promise not to write a report about your performance.” Stephen’s words were teasing, but his gaze was dark and his body had gone still. Kilian could smell the desire. Maybe Stephen was protecting himself from rejection by turning his request into a joke, but he definitely wasn’t joking.
Stephen’s desire made it hard for Kilian to control his own nature. He’d seen Stephen tear through three witches, and Kilian had always been attracted to power. Controlled power... that was like fucking catnip to him, and he worked to keep his own libido under control. “It's dangerous for me to have sex because the threat of losing control is always there. That means I can't enjoy it that much. It’s easier to avoid sex, but if you and your right hand want to have some alone time, I’ll give you as much privacy as I can.”
Stephen leaned farther forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he studied Kilian. “Are you saying getting turned made sex unfun?”
“No.” He hadn’t been a Don Juan before he’d decided to seek an upgrade.
“I love the way a good orgasm can make everything perfect for one second.” A dreamy expression floated across Stephen’s face. “You know, I am one hundred percent sex-safe. You can’t hurt me. Consider this an opportunity to explore your wild side with a partner who is way more dangerous than you. Besides, I happen to know that there are parts of you that are a little more interested than you are letting on.” Stephen glanced down at Kilian’s lap.
Kilian shifted to hide his lap before he realized that his warming cock was still safely tucked away. Stephen had bluffed him, and Kilian had fallen for it. He would have fled, but... fifteen feet.
“You can’t read minds, so don’t pretend to.”
“I don't have to. When you bit me, you drank my blood, the same blood that the demon drank when it came into this world. I can feel myself in you.” Stephen put a hand on Kilian's chest, spreading his fingers. His warmth soaked into Kilian.
“Are you suggesting that I’m infected with your demon?” That was bad. Kilian would never abandon Stephen to this half-life, but he also did not want to get trapped in Mia’s machinations.
“Not infected as much as connected.” Stephen let his talons grow so that five needle-sharp tips pressed against Kilian's chest. “I can feel the darkness in you, the hunger, the resentments and fury. Emotions boil in your soul, but you are so good at controlling it, burying it.”
“That's what you do when you have darkness in you. You know that better than most.”
Stephen shifted fast, settling into Kilian’s lap, straddling him with his forearms resting on Kilian's shoulders. “You feel so much. You want so much. I want you.”
“I don't think Mia would be amused.”
“Oh, I think she would be. I think Mia would be very pleased if our relationship grew deeper, which is the only reason to wallow in celibacy when we could be having fun.” Stephen whispered the last part in Kilian’s ear, his breath tickling Kilian’s neck.
“What makes you say she would approve?”
“Did they tell you what happened after I cursed my father?”
“They said they had to tase you, and their witches cast counter-curses to stop you.”
“Yep... And despite all that, it took two hours before the rage left me long enough for the guilt to creep in. I love my dad. When he's drinking, he is a complete ass, but his love language is anger. I remember when I was a kid and he would get angry at my teachers when they didn’t accommodate my disability.” Stephen’s expression turned fond, and he leaned back without leaving Kilian’s lap.
“There was this one special education teacher who would get angry with me for being too hyper. Dad went down there and ripped into her. He told her that if she couldn't handle one hyperactive kid then she had no business being a special education teacher. He asked if she got upset with kids in wheelchairs because they didn’t walk fast enough or deaf kids for not listening to her instructions. He practically reduced her to tears.” Stephen’s face grew pensive. “And for Dad, that was his way of telling me he loved me.”
Kilian remembered that. Stephen’s dad had harassed, attacked and belittled anyone who targeted the family while his mother had coddled and cooked and held Stephen when he’d cried. When Kilian had been young, he’d thought they were a perfect family—certainly better than his, which was fueled by Catholic guilt and self-denial. However, as an adult, he suspected they had both grown up around a plethora of dysfunction.
Stephen sighed. “When Dad called me an idiot for trying to kill myself, he was showing his own form of love. But I lost control. I didn’t care what he meant. I wanted to destroy him for saying those words, and no amount of rational thought penetrated my fury.” His face twisted with guilt.
“Your dad loves you, but that doesn’t make him less of an ass. He shouldn’t have said that to you.” Kilian swept his fingers across Stephen’s cheek. “However, you’re avoiding my question. Why would Mia want us to do this?”
“Easy,” Stephen said with an easy laugh. “It took me two hours to get control back after I cursed my own father—a man I love. But after our mission, her goon squad didn’t even need to Taser me. So, I’m fairly sure that you could sacrifice virgins under the new moon, and Mia would make excuses for you because you keep the demon in check. So what do you think about that?” Stephen bent forward and placed a kiss on the end of Kilian's nose.
“I'm still not sure how you get from there to it being a good idea for us to have sex.”
“Mia and her schemes are not a reason to have sex,” Stephen said firmly. “Sex would feel good. I suspect it would feel great, and we don’t have to worry about any consequences. Mia will report that you've increased my control over the demon, and that will protect you. And if you are hung up on the poopy pants, I can promise you that’s not my kink. Care to find out what is?” Stephen wiggled, and Kilian’s cock hardened at the friction.
Kilian grabbed Stephen’s hips. “You are entirely too tempting.”
