But I can’t get a sense of whether he’s angry at himself, at me, or at the situation.Does he regret what we’ve just done?
I hide my face against his shoulder.“Maybe…maybe we shouldn’t do this again?”
“Probably not,” he says quickly.Too quickly.
“Right.”I nod, blinking away my surprise.“Of course.It’s…”
“Inappropriate.”
I want to pound my fists on the table and shout,fuck inappropriate, and fuck your post-nut clarity, but I don’t think it would work.Instead, I sit in his lap for this so-called “aftercare,” seething.
9
DAMIANO
Iuse a tissue to clean most of the sticky mess from my stomach, then get up for a shower.IknewSeth would come around.Although it sounds like Madison might have done some topping from the bottom.If we want a true D/s dynamic, that’s something we can work on later.Although, I am a flexible Dom.I love the control.I love calling the shots, as Americans say.But I am more interested in pleasure, however that may happen.
A couple hours later, I’m dozing on my couch when Seth lets himself into my apartment.
He takes one look at me and shakes his head.“Did you set me up?”
“You mean, did I get into a car accident so that I could have a doctor’s note to avoid the baseball game where I’d booked a private box for Madison and myself, so that I wouldn’t have to spend time with her, and you would?”
“Fuck.When you say it like that…” Seth stomps into the kitchen.He emerges a moment later, beer in hand.
“You at least had fun,” I point out.
“Kyle wouldn’t have wanted this.”He shakes his head.“He was madly in love with her.Possessive.Jealous when other guys looked at her.”
“And?”
“And maybe he could’ve understood her moving on after he died.But withhis brother?”
If Seth didn’t look so disgusted with himself, I’d probably hit him.
“Kyle is gone,” I say slowly, patiently.“He doesn’t get a say in what happens to Madison.He doesn’t get to be jealous?—”
“And that’s not fucking fair,” Seth interrupts.“Heshouldbe here.Heshouldget to be jealous.”
“But he isn’t.It isn’t fair, but it’s the truth.”
Seth shakes his head.I’m not getting through to him.And maybe I can’t get through to him—I understand grief, but not on the same level.I haven’t lost a sibling.I don’t know what that feels like.
We sit quietly while Seth sips his beer.Morose motherfucker.
He sets the empty bottle on my coffee table.“She said it was a mistake, after.”
“Those were her words?”I give him a sharp look.
“Yes.No.I don’t know.”
I’ll have to get to the bottom of this.I’ll ask Madison, because she will know.I have a feeling she said no such thing, or if she did, it was a miscommunication.
“I want to take her to Low Vice on Wednesday—they’re celebrating Halloween this week.Every night is masquerade night.”At Seth’s look of doubt, I rush to add, “I already received my doctor’s clearance.I won’t bow out and force you to take her alone.Although that worked out pretty well for you today at the game, didn’t it?”
“That was a mistake,” he growls.
“According to you, or according to her?”I fold my hands over my stomach.“Because I don’t think she said that.”
