Patrick didn’t look like he believed him, so Jono kissed the doubtful expression off his face. Patrick chased after his mouth when Jono broke the kiss, stepping closer. “Then why don’t you want to fuck me? And don’t say it’s because work is getting in the way. We’ve always found time before, but you’ve pulled away every time I’ve tried to initiate something.”
Jono lifted both hands to cradle Patrick’s face, stroking a thumb over his cheekbone. “You weren’t dealing with the aftermath of assault all the rest of the times. You’ve gone back to cigarettes, and don’t think I haven’t noticed the whiskey bottle was replaced twice this week.”
Patrick went still in his arms. “Tremaine didn’t rape me.”
“Doesn’t need to be rape to hurt, love.”
They stood there in silence for a long moment before Patrick spoke. “Most days I’m a living reminder of things I want to forget.”
“Drowning yourself in smoke and liquor won’t take the memories away.”
“I see a therapist.”
“I know you do. All I’m saying is don’t come to me because you think you need to prove something to yourself. I’m not going anywhere, and I’ll wait however long you need to feel okay again.”
Patrick tightened his fingers in Jono’s hair, holding on. His shields that had been raised ever since leaving Central Park slowly disappeared. Jono drew in a breath, smelling exhaustion and weary resignation beneath the bitter scent Patrick carried on his skin, but no fear, no apprehension.
“This isn’t—” Patrick broke off, pressing his face into Jono’s hands. “I don’t want you to fuck me just to prove something to myself, Jono. I want you because that’s what I want. Because that’smychoice. If you don’t want me, then just say so.”
The truth in his words was bright and clean in his scent. Jono pushed away from the door, his hands dropping down to Patrick’s hips, then his thighs, hauling the shorter man into his arms. Patrick wrapped his legs around Jono’s waist, arousal seeping through his scent, slow and thick like molasses.
“Never going to not want you, love.”
“You sure?”
Jono thought about the soulbond that tied them together but knew it didn’t dictate his heart. “It’s not magic that makes me want you, Pat.”
“If you say so.”
“I do.” Jono gently squeezed Patrick’s ass, looking him in the eye. “Now, I’m going to take you to bed, like you want. And if you tell me to stop, I will.”
Patrick laughed tiredly against his mouth, fingers tangling in his hair. “Just make me feel good and I’ll never have to.”
Jono carried Patrick to the bedroom and took him at his word, attuned to Patrick’s body and scent in a hyperaware way. Depositing Patrick on their bed, Jono set about undressing him until he wore nothing but his dog tags, the scars on his body prominent against his skin. Jono kissed his way down Patrick’s chest, tracing over scar tissue with his tongue, mouth drifting down warm skin until he could wrap his lips around Patrick’s cock.
Patrick let out a groan that sounded like it hurt, bucking into Jono’s mouth. Jono gripped his hips and held him in place, taking his time in familiarizing himself with Patrick’s scent and taste. Fingers gripped his hair and pulled, but Jono ignored the desperate tugging in favor of swallowing Patrick’s cock down to the root.
Patrick slid his leg over Jono’s shoulder to dig his heel against Jono’s back. Jono hummed at the pressure, and Patrick made a strangled sound in the back of his throat. “Holyfuck.”
Jono swallowed around the thickening length in his mouth before pulling off, his tongue dragging against sensitive skin the entire way. Patrick breathed in deep, unclenching his hand from Jono’s hair. His pupils were blown wide, a flush coming up on his cheeks.
“Need a moment?” Jono asked with a teasing smile, stroking Patrick’s cock.
“Shut up and get out of your goddamn clothes so you can fuck me. I’ve missed your cock.”
Jono laughed as he stood, already stripping off his T-shirt. “Whatever you want.”
“Exactly.”
He shed his boots and the rest of his clothes, crawling onto the bed after Patrick. Jono kissed him again, letting their cocks slide together as they rocked against each other. Patrick’s hands stroked down his back to grab his ass and pull him in. Jono settled heavily against the cradle of Patrick’s hips, seeking out that plush mouth for a kiss.
“How do you want me?” Jono murmured.
Patrick arched beneath him, panting as Jono sucked at the sensitive skin just beneath his ear. “I want you in me.”
Jono licked his way down Patrick’s throat, biting gently at his collarbone and the thick edge of scar tissue there. “Didn’t answer my question.”
“The hell I didn’t.”
