“That was uncalled for, Jamie,” Charlotte admonished.
“There are laws in this country detailing why I can’t parade myself around in uniform for your campaign.I need the both of you to remember and respect that because I’m not crossing that line for your political gain,” Jamie reminded them.
Despite being deployed stateside with the MDF now, Jamie didn’t see his family all that often.Metahumans who worked for the government were required by law to keep their identities secret.That was extremely difficult when it came to his well-known family.If he ever left for civilian life, his identity could be revealed, a fact his father had been reminding him about for months already.
“I don’t require you in uniform; I merely require you here, with your family,” Richard replied sharply.“I announced my candidacy on December seventh.The media asked about you thevery next day.Hiding isn’t going to make this go away, Jamie.”
“Then perhaps you should stick to the excuse you’ve used for years when it comes to my absence—that I’m deployed and unavailable.”
“That story becomes difficult to believe when you’re seen in public around DC.”
“Then tell them it’s none of their business.”
“I’ll do no such thing.That will only invite them to keep digging.”
“Then it seems we’re at a stalemate.”Jamie dipped his piece of salmon in his sister’s tiny bowl of soy sauce rather than pour his own.He’d always used her soy sauce if they sat next to each other during the meal since they were little children.Leah had a tendency to over-pour the salty condiment, providing enough for two people, and never minded the amount of wasabi Jamie mixed in.They ended up with a nice compromise neither had given up on over the years.“Don’t expect me to cave, Father.If I won’t cave for the enemy, I won’t cave for you.”
Richard’s eyes narrowed as he set down his chopsticks.“Is that what you see your family as?The enemy?”
Jamie was out of practice when it came to fighting with his family.That was a poor choice of words, in retrospect, but he’d said them.What’s more, he’d meant them.“I have never seen you as my enemy.Your job, however, is detrimental to mine in the sense that it threatens myclassifiedidentity.”
“You were ours first, Jamie,” Charlotte said quietly as she studied him.
Jamie set down his own chopsticks, the few pieces of sushi he’d eaten souring in his stomach.“I will always be your son, Mother.But what I am now is something I can’t walk away from.You’ll support Father’s ambitions, so why can’t you do the same for mine?”
“Because Richard’s ambitions won’t get him killed.”
And therein lay the crux of the matter.A mother’s love for her children, as distant and as cool as Charlotte had loved them at times, was still love.She’d carried them both in her body, eschewing a surrogate over wanting to feel them alive in her womb.His mother had never stopped loving him, even when he’d been breaking her heart with his decision to stay in uniform again and again and again.
Jamie knew he wouldn’t ever stop breaking his mother’s heart.
“I’m sorry my choices keep hurting you, but the work I do is important to me,” Jamie said.
“And you will always be important to us.”Charlotte took a sip of her sake-based cocktail before meeting his gaze.“But you know where we stand in regards to your job.”
Jamie knew his mother dreamed of the day he would retire from the MDF and choose a less dangerous life.Leaving wouldn’t stop him being a metahuman, and neither would it stop her from reliving the day she almost lost him.No matter what path he chose, Jamie knew one or both of them would be forever unhappy.
“I have balanced my time as best I can between my duties at work and the ones at home,” he said.
“It’s not enough,” Richard replied.
Unspoken went his parents’ opinion that it would never be enough.Jamie prided himself on being an excellent commander who did his best to find the best path forward, but he didn’t know how to dig his way out of this hole.Going on four years of having this same sort of argument had yet to fix anything.
“What would you have me do?”Jamie asked irritably.“You say you want me with you, but you know I can’t risk my identity.”
“No one sees your face when your work takes you into the field.”
“That’s not the point.Showing up once won’t be enough for you.It never is.”
“Then maybe you should think about cutting back on your work if you won’t outright quit.Change teams or take up a desk job.Something that doesn’t have you fighting in such a way that you show up in the news and have to risk your life all the time,” Charlotte said more than a little tartly.
The sudden shortness of breath Jamie experienced at her words was something he fought hard to get under control without anyone noticing.It took him only a few seconds, but it felt longer in some ways.The mere thought of someone else leading his team was a nightmare he’d dreamed too many times to count over the years, and the panic blooming in his chest was difficult to get under control.
“I’m not going to ask to be reassigned, Mother.My team needs me,” Jamie got out in a mostly steady voice.
“Yourfamilyneeds you more.”
What Charlotte didn’t understand, and probably never would, was that his team was family.They were his and always would be, chosen by luck and chance, forged through the brotherhood of war none of them could ever leave behind.Trying to make his parents understand that was a futile effort.
