I side-eyed him. “What the fuck doeshathmean?”
“It’s the old version of has, and it’s how that phrase is used.”
Oh. Whatever. “I’m a modern man, Nathan.”
I caught him smiling out his window.
Fuck him. Fuck him for making me think about him all night.
At two AM, I turned off my TV and just let the silence fill the place.
I’d actually invited him to my sanctuary. My little studio slice of heaven. Where I could see every inch of the place, aside from my bathroom, from the comfort of my cushy couch. The sleep alcove, the kitchenette, the dining area where I just dumped mail, and the entryway. A place that was sacred to me. I’d never had a guy over. My mother was allowed to visit because she tended to bring casseroles and steaks. My brother wasn’t welcome. He had a nasty habit of taking off his dirty socks and leaving them here.
So what was it about Nathan?
Even though I was making plans for a life full of mess, gray areas, and chaos, I wasn’t there yet. I’d just started dipping my toes in the world of adoption policy. I quizzed Ma sometimes. I spent an hour or two at the library here and there. I made calls. I was learning about state laws and federal laws—and how nobody seemed to have solid answers, because every rule had an exception. Not to mention extensive waiting periods. But other than that, everything in my life could be fit into specific boxes. Friends belonged in one. Family in another. Hookups were kept separate. I didn’t have many exes, so that box was small. I was very new at exploring BDSM as well, making that box even smaller.
Nathan should be crammed into the hookup box, but that didn’t feel right.
He was dating material. That much was clear.
Maybe I was rusty. I hadn’t had a boyfriend since… Fuck.
I scratched my head.
The year after high school? Nameless hookups and casual play partners were so much easier.
I blew out a breath and rose from the couch, and I brought my plate and soda can with me to the kitchen.
2:09
Was he gonna come? He hadn’t indicated either way. The topic had been forgotten, and I hadn’t brought it up again, in case he’d wanted to let me down easy.
Good thing I knew where he worked. I could yell curse words at his boss’s window and lure him out.
How long did it take to walk from the Westwater? Two, three minutes?
Before I could overthink further, the buzzer went off on my intercom, and a ridiculous grin took over. I hurried out into the entryway and pressed the button.
“Sorry for the late call, Mr. Riley, but I have a Nathan Mills here to see you…?”
“No problem, Roger. Send him up,” I replied. “You can put him on my list and give him the guest code, by the way.”
The fuck did I just say?
“Will do, sir. Have a good night.”
Now I was handing out my guest code left and right to guys I’d just met.
There was something wrong with me.
Fuck it. He was here. He was on his way up. He’d taken the hint, I hoped. He had to know I was interested.
I ducked into my bathroom and applied more deodorant. I ran a hand through my hair too, and I nodded to myself. Abs on display. My lucky sweatpants on. I wore them every time I watched an away game.
It worked occasionally.
We were nearing a minute now since Roger had buzzed me, so Nathan should be here any second. The elevators were pretty fast, and he was only coming to the ninth floor.
