He threw me a glare. “Do you think you’re funny?”
“Do you see me laughing?” I shot back. “What’s it gonna be, Nate? I chose—and it was the easiest thing ever. What doyouchoose? Can you choose our family over a kink that’s not even yours?”
“That’s not the goddamn problem,” he growled. “You’re letting a fear run your life—and no, I won’t choose that.Ever.”
Motherfucker, he infuriated me. And it brought a sense of relief. Anger was as easy as breathing. It flooded my chest and numbed the pain.
“Then we’re fucking done,” I seethed. “You can call it a fear if that makes you sleep better. I call it my own choice to put us first.” With that, I reached for my jeans on the chair in the corner, and I put them on.
Nate laughed darkly. “A choice to put us first—that’s rich.”
Fuck you. Fuck you so hard, you son of a bitch.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he demanded. “We have Thanksgiving dinner at my parents’ tomorrow.”
“I gotta get outta here.” I walked over to our closet and found a hoodie. The rage flowed freely, and I clung to it. If this was what he wanted, so fucking be it. I’d find a way to be cool with it. “I’ll spend the night at Theo’s.”
“Ash—”
“I’ll be here tomorrow,” I snapped. “What the fuck do you take me for? I’ll be here.”
But not right now. I had to get out before the pain returned.
“Wait!” He stopped me in the doorway before I could open the door, and I didn’t even recognize the look in his eyes. There was nothing there. “Did you mean it? Are we over?”
I swallowed as the pain almost broke through the fury.
“I chose us. You didn’t. So yeah, I guess we are,” I said.
A few hours later
Arlington
Nathan Riley
Hold it together a while longer.
Breathe.
Don’t fall apart.
I’d be home again in half an hour. Alone in ten, although I’d rather not lose my fucking shit on the Beltway.
“Daddy, listen!”
“What?” I glanced in the rearview, finding Lily watching me expectantly. “I’m sorry, baby. What did you say?”
She giggled and shook her head. “You’re silly. When’a we wiv Nana and Pop-Pop?”
Yeah, Daddy was super silly.
“Very soon.” I forced a smile and refocused on traffic.
I could fool Lily and Micah. And Dylan was still at his friend’s house, so he’d be dropped off at my folks’ later. Hallie, though. I’d caught her watching me all morning. She was perceptive.
Within a few minutes, I parked next to Dad’s car, and Hallie jumped out. More than that, she opened the door to help Lily out, and that spoke volumes. For Hallie to take a break from her moodiest stage in life so far—to help a parent without being told a dozen times first? She knew something was wrong.
Goddammit.
