“Good,” she breathed.
“Amaia.”
“Hmm?”
Pausing in my scrubbing, I pressed my forehead to hers, feeling her heartbeat against me when I dragged my palm to it.
“Thank you,” I said quietly. Her breath hitched, and I saw my eyes reflected in her own. “You saved many of my people. I won’t ever forget that.”
For once, she seemed at a loss for words.
“But don’teverdo that again.”
She frowned.
I grabbed a clean cloth from a basket next to the pool, dipping it into the warm water. Gently, I dragged it against her face, trying to erase all evidence of her bloody tears and ash and grit and soot.
She took my wrist to still my actions. “I won’t ever hide again when people need me. You have to know that.”
“I asked you to stay here,” I merely said, my tone coming out harsher than I’d intended. My hand was shaking, and I couldn’t make it stop.
Amaia seemed to notice too, and she took my palm in hers, squeezing tight. “Alaryk.”
“Fuck,” I murmured softly, releasing the cloth, letting it float on the surface of the water as I scrubbed my free hand down my own face. I thought maybe the shock was catching up with me. I didn’t want her to see it.
“I’m here,” she said, taking my jaw into her hand. She pressedher lips against mine, and I immediately clutched her to me, trying to be conscious of my own strength so I didn’t hurt her accidentally. “I’m here,” she murmured against my lips. “I’m okay.”
“I saw you,” I murmured. “On the field. And I thought how easy it would be to lose you. How quickly it could happen. And it fuckingterrifiedme, Amaia. Don’t ever do that again.”
Her eyes widened.
“I wanted to help,” she argued. “Ihadto. You said yourself—my magic is rare. So why not use it to help your people?”
“Because I don’t want to loseyou, Amaia,” I snapped, my voice harsh and guttural, but I knew the intent of my words landed. “I can’t loseyou. And it’s not just because of your damn magic.”
Time seemed to pause, like we were both holding our breath.
“It’s not?” she whispered, strangely still and rapt on my words.
“No,” I bit out.
She’d become more to me than I’d ever imagined…and I couldn’t quite pinpoint when it had even happened.
Only when I’d thought she was dead, lying listless and unmoving, her head in Syris’s lap…I’d had the dizzying sensation that I had splintered into two.
One moment into the next. One realization, and now I would never be the same.
Both of us were quiet after that, ruminating in our own thoughts, at the unspoken confession I’d just made.
Quickly, I finished up in the bathing pool, scrubbing at us both until we were clean of the grime. And only when I had her dried off and clothed in one of my tunics did I feel marginally better.
“Do you have to go back?” she asked softly, pressing her forehead into my chest, her arms coming around my waist. I wasdressed in my riding vest, having just finished clasping the catches. “You need to rest too.”
“I’ll try to be back as soon as I can,” I told her. I nudged her until her face was tipped up to me. I kissed her gently, feeling her sigh. “I promise. Sleep. And don’t you dare sneak off to the hatchery. Tarkosh will handle it.”
When I pulled open the door, she said, “Alaryk.”
Looking over my shoulder at her, I raised my brow as ash danced inside.
