But I wasn’t Velle and I never could be. Though I had certainly channeled her energy when I’d been speaking with Lady Kyda.
“How have you been?” I asked.
“Good,” Velle replied. A sly smile crept onto her lips. “I’ve taken up with a noble, but you can’t tell anyone. Not yet.”
“What?” I asked, eyes widening. “Who?”
Velle shook her head, her smile secretive. It was like her to be dramatic, but I was surprised when she wouldn’t say the name.
“A friend of a friend,” Velle said. “That’s all I’ll say. I don’t expect to be working for House Kaalium much longer.”
Everything she’d wanted, then. It happened so quickly…just like my new reality.
“I’m glad for you,” I said quietly, eyeing the satisfaction and ease on her features. Was that why she’d approached me tonight? Because she might be leaving soon? “Do you love him?”
She laughed. “Love? Of course not.”
I frowned, even as disappointment bit into me. For a moment, Ididjudge her. How could she give herself to someone she didn’t love? Commit to them?
I picked at the pastry some more, popping a little bite into my mouth. Velle studied me for a long time, making me shift on me feet in uncertainty.
“What is it?” I asked, tucking a strand of hair behind my ears.
“I’m bored,” she declared. “I find these gatherings so terribly dull now.”
I supposed she would, considering her new noble.
“Want to go sneak into the kitchens and make Saira give us some of her cream pudding?”
My heart gave a little leap, mingled with nostalgia perhaps. “She made some?”
“Yes, and she didn’t serve it here. She’s saving it forus. Come on.”
Us.That sounded so lovely, like I was part of something again.
Maybe this was a peace offering. And it would be nice to visit the kitchen. Like I could pretend I was my old self.
I wanted that, I realized. I wanted the simplicity of being in a warm kitchen at night, listening to all the scandalous stories and gossip the keepers had learned at the gathering while we all giggled and sipped on spiced tea, munching on the snacks that Saira had saved us.
At least I didn’t feel lonely in those moments.
“Let’s go,” I said, and she took my hand, like we were back to normal.
“Are you sure it won’t get you in trouble with yourKyzaire?” Velle asked. I thought I caught a flash of delight in her gaze, a small smirk on her features, though she wiped it away. Perhaps she still wasn’tquiteover what had happened between us.
“I don’t even see him,” I admitted. “He won’t mind. I’ve been here long enough, and I’d rather not insult another noble when I open my mouth.”
Velle pulled me from the room, and I felt a small burst of relief the moment we were away from all the prying eyes. I dragged in a deep breath, looking around the blissfully empty atrium. Everyone had made their way into the ballroom over an hour ago.
When Velle tugged me up the staircase, I frowned, “Why are we going this way?”
“Maudoric wanted the main hallway blocked off to guests. We have to go around.”
“Oh, all right.”
We went through the West Wing to wrap around to the stairs on the opposite side. The ballroom noise still echoed through the grand walls of the keep, since the floor below was open to the upper levels, but the farther we ventured from the gathering, the more at ease I felt.
At least until we passed by the hallway that led to Kaldur’s study. Velle slowed.
