“And I don’t know what to make of that,” I confessed.
It went quiet as we regarded one another. Even though I felt open and laid bare—evenphysically—with every passing moment, I felt a little sorrow return. Because I could actuallyseeKaldur rebuilding the walls I’d tried to scratch down with my dull claws, barricading his borders like I was the enemy. He was pulling away.Again.
“Don’t,” I whispered, leaning up to press my lips to the little scar on his chin. “Please…stay with me.”
“I can’t give you everything you want, Erina,” Kaldur said, his voice both softened and cold. “And I’m not a fool to be manipulated—do you understand? You don’t think many have tried before?”
I frowned. “What?”
Such an odd thing to say.
“What are you talking about?”
But then he smiled, a quirking of his lips. He didn’t answer me. Instead, after looking between us, he said, “I got too carried away tonight. But remember our contract—you’ll need to start taking marroswood now. Understood? I’ll let Maudoric know to serve it with yourbaanyestarting tomorrow.”
I couldn’t help but flinch. The mention of the contract felt intentional, especially when he slid from underneath my grasp to go retrieve hislorepipe from the table.
“You can rest here if you wish,” he told me, inhaling a deep inhale oflorebefore releasing it into the room. “But I won’t be back tonight.”
“Where are you going?” I asked, watching when he turned to the door.
“I have work to do.”
And when he left me there, I felt every joyous feeling fade. I hopped down from the bed, feeling a twinge between my thighs and a new soreness emerge. I stood, naked, in the quiet room, which had only felt full and exciting moments before. Now it felt empty and cold.
I went to my dress, gathering it up from the ground, slipping it back over my head.
I was proud of myself when I didn’t cry…at least not until I made it safely back to my room.
Finally, my fantasies about Kaldur had become a reality.
And in the aftermath, I had never felt lonelier.
CHAPTER 21
KALDUR
Intentionally, I’d expanded the guest list for the dinner tonight. Before it had been a small, intimate affair with a handful of close family friends. Now I had Maudoric wringing her hands together as more and more people flowed through the doors of my keep. Nobles, shopkeepers, leaders of guilds and organizations for farmers, builders, tradesmen, and merchants.
The atrium was filled with guests already. Instead of a formal dinner, Maudoric had changed it so there were circular tables of food and drink spread out among main reception area and into the ballroom, which barely saw any use.
I would make it up to her later, I decided, but earlier I’d been brief and gruff with my orders. The whole keep knew my mood was foul these last two days, ever since I’d returned from Salaire…and ever since my night with Erina.
Who still hadn’t made her appearance.
Maudoric had ensured she had something suitable to wear for the evening. By now she would be able to hear the voices and laughter echoing throughout the entire keep. There had to be well over one hundred people here tonight.
Lydrasa arrived, on the arm of the son of House Braan. Ravar,I believed his name was, but the House of Braan had so many sons and daughters, I couldn’t be certain.
“Beautiful, as always,” I complimented her when the two of them reached me. I knew she hated clique remarks, and so I said it with a smile.
She quirked her brow, a flash of amusement stinging through her. Despite her companion standing stoically beside her, she leaned close to me. Into my ear, she said, “I’m here for one thing alone,Kyzaire. To see the little human who’s got you in knots.”
The sound that fell from my throat was gruff. “You’ll be disappointed, then, because she hasn’t come down.”
“I should warn you,” Lydrasa said. “Word has spread of her. Apparently you were seen with her in the village market? The news is raging through the Houses.”
“I’d noticed,” I said. I’d felt dozens and dozens of eyes on me already, making my skin crawl. It had been inevitable—I’d always known that—but what worried me waswhatexactly had been spread.
