My brow furrowed. Something was wrong.
“Have I upset you?” I asked quietly, observing his expression carefully. His words seemed slightly mocking.
“Of course not,” he replied easily enough. He slid toward me, and when he placed his fingers beneath my chin, he tilted my head back. “Why would you ask that?”
“I don’t know—you seem…” I trailed off.Let it go,I thought. “Never mind.”
His other hand came to gently swipe under my eyes. “You look tired.”
“I was, um, waiting for you last night. I thought you wanted to feed when you returned, so I?—”
“I returned late and didn’t want to disturb you,” he said,cutting off my words. He released me. His body was close to me, but something told me he’d never been further away. I didn’t understand it.
“And how was your dinner?” I asked, wondering if something had happened there.
“Illuminating,” he answered, never taking his eyes off me.
He said nothing else. Merely watched me as I began to squirm under his perusal. It felt barbed, like he was dissecting me under that gaze. He hadn’t fed since yesterday morning…was that the reason for his strange mood?
“I waited for you this morning too,” I said softly, clutching the strap of my satchel.
“I’ll feed now,” came his guttural response, one that made my eyes widen, realizing we were in an abandoned courtyard but not that far away from the main bustling square. I could still hear the echo of footsteps and laughter and chatter, even tucked back here.
“Now?” I choked out. “Here?”
“Unless you’d rather not,” he murmured easily.
“No, it’s not that. It’s…”
“I have somewhere to be soon,” Kaldur replied. “I’ll be gone for a while.”
“Oh, I see.”
He smiled. “I’ll come to you another time. Let’s not?—”
“No,” I said quickly, reaching out to take his arm and bringing him back to him when he stepped away. “Now is fine.”
I didn’t know how to explain it, but he felt detached, like he was purposefully trying to keep me away. When all I wanted was to be close to him. And when he was feeding, that was when we always felt closest.
I was beginning to crave that feeling like a need. I felt protected, wanted, and safe in those moments. And how could I not when it was Kaldur?
He didn’t resist. I tilted my neck to the side for him, leaningback against the shop building wall. But then he shook his head. Before I could blink, he flipped me around, pressing me so that my palms were against the stone wall. I frowned, my lips parted to say something, but then I felt his hand tugging at my hair, exposing my neck.
The bite of his fangs came next, followed by the warmth of his feeding.
I couldn’t see him or touch him like this. Stone scraped into my palms as my nails curled. His grip on me was unyielding, keeping me easily in place. He held himself away from my back, far enough that I could feel the cold breeze between us.
This wasn’t like our usual feedings. This felt…clinical. Like I was only fulfilling a need, like I could be anybody to him.
So while the usual pleasure from the feeding was present…it didn’t leave me feeling warm or excited or needful.
And it was over much too soon. Kaldur retracted his fangs before healing the bite mark. When I frowned, turning to look over my shoulder at him, his nostrils flared at whatever he saw in my expression.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, pinching his brow as he backed away. “It’s not the time or place for this.”
I nodded, agreeing.
“I’m not of the right mind for this now,” he said before meeting my eyes. So something was wrong? I’d figured as much. “I have to leave for a few nights.”
