“I’m sorry—I just came in from the gardens. I lost track of time,” she said quickly. There was eagerness in her gaze. “Did you want to?—”
If she asked me outright, I might not have the discipline to deny her.
“Later,” I rasped. “I’m heading out to a dinner tonight.”
“Oh,” she said, blinking her wide eyes. She had charcoal across her cheek again, and I wiped at it, frowning, rubbing at the smudge until it disappeared, wondering how she always dirtied herself there. Her skin was hot and she smelled more tempting than that morning, but I knew that was the hunger in me. “Oh, you look very handsome.”
She’d finally looked down at my clothing. The compliment fell easily from her lips, as did her pleased shy smile.
“Will you draw me like this,dallia?” I rumbled, unable to resist the small tease. “Look your fill. I expect to see my likeness when I return to you tonight.”
Her laugh released some tension that had been lining my shoulders. The last two days had been shockingly easy with her. We had a routine, one we’d fallen into. Feedings only, yes. But there was an ease of talking with her, as charged as the conversations might be. It felt like we were both holding our breath in those conversations. I found them exciting and tantalizing, even though they were innocent. And I found myself thinking of her far too much when she was absent.
The bond,I knew, further wiggling itself into me like a parasite.
“I’ll see what I can do,” she replied. Her gaze ran over me again. Shehadlost track of time, it seemed. She’d been on her way out to the gardens when I’d caught her in the hallway just that morning. Had she not returned since?
“Make sure you eat and take yourbaanye,” I told her gruffly. She needed to take better care of herself. She couldn’t survive the entire day on fruit from my orchards if she didn’t want to come inside.
“I will,” she promised. “See you tonight.”
I inclined my head, then watched her disappear down the hallway to her quarters.
And suddenly the night seemed endless until I could see her next.
I smiledat Kyda through the silver smoke oflorefloating throughout the dining hall of House Azola. Even the smoke couldn’t dull the snap of tension in my shoulders as I counted down the moments until I could take my leave politely now that dinner had ended.
I’d been here for hours, and I knew that Lydrasa had spread the rumors already. I’d caught the lingering stares, the ways nobles tried to hide the quirk of their mouths. Every time I caught a glimpse of my former lover, irritation burned in my gut at her sly smile.
Her message was clear. No one rejected her, not even aKyzaire.
But that’s her mistake,I thought. She thought herself invincible against House Kaalium because she’d had one of its sons between her thighs.Nothingmade her protected against my House unless she was bound to me in marriage or blood…and she wasn’t.
I would speak with her before I left. I would give her a warning of my own because my patience had already been rubbed thin within a mere few moments of entering House Azola.
Kyda was Lydrasa’s mother, who’d pulled me into conversation as a familiar keeper roamed the room with a tray of a variety ofloreyields from different years. My eyes had narrowed on her, knowing that she was one of mine, and I wondered why she was serving House Azola tonight.
“Tell me,Kyzaire, if the South Road is being extended to Salaire, then perhaps it will be easier to import the Southern silksfrom your brother’s territory. I know the shopkeeper here in Vyaan. He would be delighted if we got a steady supply in. It always sells so fast,” Kyda told me. She smiled. “Of course, he always keeps some for me. He knows how much I enjoy it.”
“As he should,” I said, taking a sip of my brew from the silver goblet. All around me, I could feel the circling of other nobles, all waiting for a chance to steal me for a conversation. I’d already spoken to nearly half of those in attendance. “I’ll see what arrangements can be made. But if you’ll pardon me, Kyda…I need to speak with your daughter.”
“Oh, of course,” she answered, her eyes twinkling knowingly. Whatever she assumed, I would let her assume it. As long as I could leave as soon as possible. And Lydrasa was the last obstacle in my way.
I hurried through the crowded room, dodging pulls into circles and conversations with an easy smile and apologies.A mask.That was what Erina had called it, hadn’t she? And she’d been right.
Sometimes I worried I’dbecomethis mask. I worried I didn’t know who I was anymore. Once, I’d never cared about the opinions of others. I’d done what I’d wanted. The luxury of youth, I supposed.
“I need to speak with you,” I murmured into Lydrasa’s ear when I reached her, my grip on her arm firm. She’d been speaking with a son of House Braan. Judging by his darkened cheeks, I wondered if Lydrasa was already hunting for my replacement.
“My pleasure,Kyzaire,” Lydrasa purred, her lips pulled into a playful smile.
“Privately.”
She inclined her head, excusing herself from the conversation. We passed the familiar keeper and Lydrasa touched her arm before leading me into a quiet hallway off the main dining hall.
“Why is one of my keepers serving at your gathering?” I askedwhen we were alone, enclosed in a private sitting room, blissfully quiet and clear of foggy smoke and raucous laughter. My ears nearly rang in relief.
“Velle?” Lydrasa asked, quirking a brow. “She used to work for House Azola. Did you not know? She’ll still visit us at times, offer to help with our parties if it’s a quiet night at your keep. I didn’t think to mention it because I didn’t think you’d care.”
