“Hmm?”
“Ask whatever you wish to ask me,Missiki,” she said, sending me a pointed look as we walked through the horde. Our daily walks, one of many. It was evening, however, and the red color from the sunset was making everyone uneasy. It wasn’t often there was a red sunset. As such, many of the horde had retreated to theirvolikisfor the night.
As we passed domed tents, I heard dozens of different voices, of laughter. A moan or two, which only spiked my curiosity. It made me realize, however, thatvolikiswere not as soundproof as I thought. It made me flush wondering if Wrune’s entire horde had heard my own moans and cries this last week, echoing through the quiet camp. Then I thought it was probably best ourvolikiwas situated apart from the others, if only to allow more privacy.
The last week had been…conflicting. And truthfully, I found it a little worrisome howeasylife felt within Wrune’s horde. I’d been so used to struggle and hardship the majority of my life that living here was…strange.
And life with Wrune?
Even more so.
My belly fluttered whenever I spied him throughout the horde. Pinching anticipation built inside me once night fell because I knew that I’d have him to myself soon. He had me addicted to his taste, his scent, his touch, his voice. He had me craving the pleasure only he could give me, pleasure he wrang from me every moment he got.
At night, we took our meals together. He’d spoken to me briefly about the outpost—thesarukof Rath Rowin, he called it, his grandfather’s own—where he’d grown up. A cold fortress on the border of the northlands, though it lay to the west, where the temperatures weren’t as frigid.
I got the impression it hadn’t been ahappychildhood, not quite. He rarely spoke of his father, though I’d asked about him. He’d never known his mother, though he’d often heard tales of her from his grandparents.
In turn, I told him about my own village. About my father. About my aunt. Though I said nothing about what happened after the village burned, about Song’s murder, about Benn’s leadership, about the Dead Mountain. It went unspoken between us. And I preferred it that way.
And at night, after he’d wrung pleasure from me and taken his own release, I slept against him. When he fell asleep before me, I’d press my face to his chest and listen to his even breaths. I’d trace the scars across his abdomen that I didn’t have the courage to ask him about. In those moments, I wondered what it would be like to have him as my own. In those moments, I pretended that he was.
And what I felt building within me those nights was a frightening thing because I realized that I was beginning to care for Wrune. Care for him in a way I knew I shouldn’t.
In those darkened nights, I wondered if that was what happiness felt like. Or at least, a deep, comforting contentedness.
And that made me feel conflicted. Because I felt like I was turning my back on the silent promise I’d made to Tess. I felt like I shouldn’tfeelthis happy when there were others that were suffering, especially when I knew what that suffering felt like.
“You’ve been holding your tongue all day,” Hukri added, shaking me from my thoughts. During the day, when we walked through the horde, she tended to trail behind me, as a gesture of respect for my position. Now that there weren’t many Dakkari lingering around the encampment as witnesses, she strode at my side. Like a friend. A confidant.
That was exactly what she’d become to me.
The words prompted me to remember another issue I’d been mulling. One that made me embarrassed but which bothered me.
I stopped on the pathway, a natural road that had been made by the daily steps and strides of over a hundred Dakkari and a handful of humans.
Lowering my voice, I told her, “TheVorakkar…he hasn’t…he…”
My tongue felt tied in a different way than what I’d experienced the majority of my life. After that excruciating power, mingled with that sharp, uncontrolled pain I’d felt on the plains, I rarely stammered over my words. I didn’t understand it. Whether it was a gift from Kakkari, or whether that pain had been a payment, the cost of giving me my words back…I didn’t know.
“He pleasures me,” I told her, feeling my face flame at the whispered admission. “And he takes his own release but…since the night of thetassimara, he’s never attempted tojoinwith me.”
Wrune usually spent his seed over the furs, rolling his hips to the rhythm of my moans, or he stroked himself to release, the long arcs of his seed landing on my belly or breasts, which seemed to please him immensely.
He’d even let me touchhima few times. I’d taken his cock in my hand, curious even as I squeezed my thighs against the throbbing sensation that pounded there. I’d loved watching the expressions that came over his face as I stroked him, almost as much as hearing his deep, endless groan, and the thick heat of his seed as it rolled down the back of my hand.
Yet, he’d never nudged that cock against me and thrust into me. I’d been aching to feel him inside me again. I’d been aching to feel that primal, dizzying sensation as his thick cock rubbed and teased places I never knew could feel thatgood.
“Oh,” Hukri whispered. To her credit, she hid her surprise well. I was used to the expression she commonly wore whenever I asked her these kinds of things. One of patience and understanding.
“Is that strange?” I asked, frowning.
“Well…” she trailed off and my shoulders sagged. “I’m not…certain.”
“I knew it was strange,” I said, sighing, and resumed my steps. After a moment, Hukri followed until she caught up with me. “I ask myself why that is, why he won’t. And all I can think is that he wants the horde to know we…well, the washers have been busy with our furs, haven’t they? And the seamstresses mended a couple when Wr—when theVorakkardug his claws into them.”
“Lysi,” Hukri said carefully. “There has been no gossip within the horde that theVorakkarhas not been in your bed. That I can assure you.”
And I’d started to notice that no one met my eyes anymore. If I asked anything of anyone, they immediately jumped to procure me whatever I needed. Thebikkus, the seamstresses. Even themrikro, thepyrokimaster, had taken time to entertain my questions about the fascinating creatures.
