I nodded and I blew out a slow breath. I’d figured as much. Reaching forward for the cloth that was draped over the side of the tub, I held it open as Hukri sprinkled the soap granules into it.
“Here, let me,Missiki,” she offered, taking the cloth. I’d had a restless, nearly sleepless night and so I let her take it without protest.
I closed my eyes as she washed and scrubbed through my hair. As she gently washed my limbs. I handled the cleaning between my legs, however, biting my lip when the soft cloth was almost too much. I was sensitive, especially there.
“Give him time,Missiki,” came Hukri’s gentle, whispered voice, as if she was aware of the guard out front listening in. “Marriage is change. For aVorakkar, especiallyour Vorakkar, I suspect that it is especially jarring.”
My brow furrowed and I frowned a little. I didn’t know what she meant by that exactly but I nodded nonetheless.
“Regardless,” I said, making up my mind, “I think I’ll sleep in the othervolikitonight. The one with the map.”
Hukri frowned. “I don’t think that’s wise,Missiki. He will not allow that.”
I shook my head. “This is hisvoliki. I won’t drive him from it. And it will be good to have my own space, won’t it?”
I’d fallen asleep with the scent of him filling my nostrils and I’d dreamed of his touch, of sex. When I woke, I’d bemoaned that I was ruined now. That he’d ruined me because how could I go back to a life without such pleasure and heat andneed?
I was getting spoiled. I needed to remember what it was like in this world before him. Only that would keep me grounded. But he’d been right. I could dislike him, with his highhanded and cold arrogance, but stillcravehim.
“And can you take this off me?” I asked, touching the golden necklace around my throat that reminded me more of a cuff. “I can’t figure out where the clasp is.”
“Here,” Hukri said, reaching underneath my wet hair, her sharp claw fiddling with something at the back of the collar. I took a deep breath when it popped off and Hukri pulled it away.
I rubbed at my throat. “Thank you.”
“Such a fine thing,” she admired, rubbing the solid gold. I noticed etchings within the metal that I hadn’t noticed last night. I didn’t think they were words, however. They were more decorative, like a swirling, intricate pattern. “It’s probably from yourdeviri.”
“Mydeviri?” I asked.
“Your wedding gift,” Hukri translated. “But I am sure theVorakkarwill present it to you later today. After you get the markings.”
Markings?
My head throbbed a bit. I felt a wave of tiredness wash over me and suddenly, I felt the overwhelming realization that I had so much tolearn.
Underneath the water, my hands shifted. On instinct, I cupped my palms. What would it be like to make everything just…pause? What would it be like to make my own little home, safe from others, where I could justthink?
I smiled a little. My own little home. It would be deep within a forest, wouldn’t it? In the northlands, though the cold would require more fire fuel. I could make a hide tent like thevolikis, couldn’t I? Or build a little wooden home and insulate it much better than our home in the village had been.
I could forage and hunt. In the mornings, I could walk through the forest and remember singing with my father. In the evenings, I could warm myself by the fire and remember the overwhelming touches of a horde king.
Slowly, my smile died. The image of a perfect little home for me was overshadowed by loneliness. Because that was what I’d be, tucked deep in a forest. I’d go mad from the quiet.
“Missiki,” came Hukri’s whisper. Only it sounded frightened.
Blinking, I looked down underneath the water and saw that I’d created that familiar sphere of energy. The surface of the bath was rippling as the energy forced it away. Water zipped and thrashed around, forced away, and it sloshed over the sides of the tub, wetting the carpets.
My lips parted. Momentarily, I was stunned, frozen.
“Rothi kiv,” came a sharp bark from behind me. My breath hitched. His voice. Of course, he’d come back to hisvolikiat this precise moment.
Immediately, Hukri rose. Panicked, I envisioned the sphere bursting and I waved my hand through it, breaking whatever surface it had, interrupting whatever energy flowed there.
Like a river, I thought. To stop the flow of a river, one had to block it up.
All at once, the water calmed and I sagged back, breathing hard. Underneath the water, my fists squeezed to keep from trembling too much.
“Rothi kiv,” came Wrune’s order once again, though it held an edge of impatience this time. Hukri immediately scuttled away and I heard the entrance flap open and close behind her.
