We ascended the stairs of the stronghold, following one of theDothikkar’s servants to our rooms. I’d never liked being so high up. I thought theDothikkar’sancestral home was unnatural. The heartbeat of Dakkar could best be felt through the earth, on solid, fragrant, rich ground. It felt confining to be away from it.
After the servant showed us our rooms and assured us a bathing tub was already prepared for us inside, theVorakkarof Rath Kitala stopped me in the long corridor.
When we were alone, he said, “You seem different, Seerin. What has happened?”
“I do not know what you speak of,” I rasped.
“You have always been controlled,” Arokan said, studying me. “Unnaturally so.”
Because I’d had to be.
“Yet you openly challenge theDothikkarand show your emotions to all,” he continued. “I saw you only a month ago and you were not like this.”
Because I had not known mythissiea month ago. When I’d last seen Arokan, it had been to congratulate him on his human bride and I’d been on my way to Nelle’s village, to punish the hunters responsible for thekinnuherd.
It had seemed so long ago now.
“I am simply tired,” I told him instead of the truth. “I need rest. And you know I always hate coming toDothik. It sets my teeth on edge.”
Arokan nodded. “Then rest, my friend. Let us try to persuade theDothikkarquickly tomorrow, so that we may all return to our hordes.”
Nothing sounded better to me. TheVorakkarof Rath Kitala no doubt itched to return to his pregnant mate. And I could feel Nelle’s absence like it was a tangible thing.
I nodded and then we went into our separate rooms. Mine was richly appointed, with a high bed, plush carpets that covered the entirety of the floor, and tall windows.
I went to them. Looking out, I saw the glimmer of the capitol below. Of winding, stone roads, square, tall buildings, and alleyways that connected the city like veins in a body. There were no domedvolikihere. There was no sense of community. There was only loyalty to gold and riches.
I knew every inch of the capitol. I knew every hidden, ugly secret. I knew timetables and routines. I knew which elders and council members liked to visit the brothels and which liked their brew strong. I knew that from afar, the capitol seemed like a glittering possibility of hope, but up close, it was covered in grime.
Then I looked beyond the capitol, towards the plains. I could see the mountains of theHitriand from there, I knew which direction my horde lay. I knew where my female was and I wondered if she slept right then, or if she was awake, thinking about me as I thought about her.
Turning from the window, I went to my steaming bath, undressed, and stepped in. My body ached from the long journey and I tilted my head back, closing my eyes as the heat helped soothe my muscles.
A small sound came at the door and I watched as it opened.
My mother didn’t say anything as she stepped inside the room and closed the door behind her.
I hadn’t seen her in over a year, since I’d last been summoned toDothik. She looked older, deep creases beginning to form around the sides of her mouth and through her forehead.
But her golden hair still shimmered in a soft wave down her back and her light grey eyes met mine and held them.
She was dressed in a rich gown of maroon velvet and a heavy, gold necklace spanned wide across her throat like a collar. It was the only thing I was grateful for…that as one of theDothikkar’sfavorites, she was treated well. She had her own room in the stronghold, she ate the best foods, she dressed in luxurious things she’d only ever coveted as a brothel prostitute. She never had to worry about poverty, or earning enough gold, or forgoing another meal so I could eat instead.
My gaze went to the necklace she wore and I mused that it had more gold in it than she’d ever made during her time at the brothel.
She came to kneel next to my bathing tub and she reached out to cup my face.
“How I’ve missed you,” she whispered to me, looking into my eyes. For all my mother’s faults, I’d never once doubted her love. Not ever.
I pressed my damp forehead to her own. When I’d been younger, this was how she’d always greeted me. Sometimes, I wouldn’t see her for weeks on end, other times just a few days, but regardless, she always acted like she hadn’t seen me in decades.
She pulled away, her eyes running over my face, studying every change in me as only a mother could. I wondered if she sensed something different in me, as Arokan of Rath Kitala had.
“How far did you come?” she asked softly, still keeping my face in her hands.
“From the east,” I told her. “Four days’ travel on Lokkas.”
She nodded. “Tell me everything that’s happened since I saw you last.”
