Again, he left shortly after and she couldn’t help feeling a little lonely, although that feeling was nothing new.She had no parents and only a few close friends.Her best friend was who she missed most of all and Kate couldn’t help but agonize over how Beks was freaking out about her disappearance back on Earth.The two talked or saw each other almost every day.Surely, by now, Beks would’ve realized that something was majorly wrong.
Nothing you can do about it, Kate, she reminded herself.She was in bloodyspace.
That evening, when Vaxa finally returned, she didn’t push him away.She felt a little withdrawn, however, and after having their dinner, back in his room, he pulled her onto his lap, stroking her hair.
“What is troubling you, Kat?You have been different tonight.Are you upset with me for leaving you in my quarters again?”
“No,” she said truthfully, feeling her scalp tingle as his long fingers gingerly threaded through the strands.It felt so relaxing, so good.She savored the contact.“I’m, um, I’ve just been wondering what your planet is like.I’m…nervous.”
The space between his brow bones pinched together, his pupils contracting.“Nervous.There is no reason for you to feel nervous.”
“Can you blame me?” she asked quietly.“Three days ago, I had no idea that alien life even existed.I mean, I always thought that there was a strong possibility that there was intelligent lifesomewherein the universe, but not necessarily that I would be kidnapped by them and brought onto this ship, traveling to this new planet that will be my home for the month.”
Vaxa’s lips pressed together at her last line and Kate knew why.He wanted her to stay with him.But he had to understand that she couldn’t.Her life was on Earth.
“It’s been a little much for me to take in,” she admitted.
“I will always protect you,” he said fiercely.“Do not feel fear.Luxirians learn how to work through fear.”
“But I’m not like you.I’m human.”
“A weakness, but you will learn Luxirian ways with time.”
Record screech.
“Weakness?” she asked, stilling.“Do you think I’m weak?”
“I will admit,” he said, his tone measured, eyes watching her carefully, “that when I first saw you and realized what you were to me, what you will become to my people, I was…not thrilled that you were human.”
Kate’s mouth dropped and she scrambled up from his lap, pushing at his chest when he tried to pull her back.She stood by the edge of the bed, hands on her hips, glaring down at the alien sprawled on it.She’d just tried to confide her fears in him and he’d called herweak.
“Humans are known to be physically weak compared to many ‘alien’ species, Kat,” Vaxa tried to explain.“It has no bearing on your mental state, but rather your physical constraints.”
“If I’m soweak, then why did you choose me?”
A puzzled expression came over his features.“Because I did not have a choice.”
Kate laughed, but it came out as a loud and awkward burst of air.Whenever Kate was hurt, she got angry.And right now?She was hurt.Vaxa certainly didn’t mind his words.Her gentle alien just might have an asshole streak, after all.
Except, she found the little strain of anger she had was being quickly replaced by sadness.She didn’t know why.And it was embarrassing when she felt the backs of her eyes sting with small, little tears.
All her life, Kate had felt unwanted.She’d been in and out of foster care in her childhood, all to wonderful homes, but with families who eventually gave her up.In college, she’d tracked down her biological mother and reached out to her, only to be rejected.Her mother had given her up as a baby and she didn’t even want tomeetwith her.
And Peter…stupid fucking Peter.He’d been the one steady thing in her life during college.He was nice and said he liked to take care of her, that she never had to be alone again.He talked to her about marriage and a family, everything she’d ever wanted.She’d been happy.Until he told her he’d been seeing someone else, someone else who he wanted more than her.
It took her six months not to cry herself to sleep at night.The only person in her life who she completely trusted, one hundred percent, was her best friend, Beks.And Kate had an awful suspicion that she might not see her again.
Now, this alien…who’d told her he liked to take care of her, who said he would protect her, told her that he felt he didn’t have a choice in choosing her.Like, if he’d chosen the blonde who stood next to her in line, he’d act the exact same with her.
It hurt more than it should, which made warning bells go off in her head.
Kate turned her face away.“I don’t want to talk anymore.I’m tired,” her voice came out like a raspy whisper and she found that she couldn’t look at Vaxa.
Frowning, he pushed up from his position, sliding his legs to the ground to sit up.“Luxiva,” he said, reaching for her.But she stepped away.She went into the bathroom and closed the door, feeling tears drip down her cheeks.She wondered what the hell was the matter with her, why she was acting like this.
After a few minutes, Kate knew she couldn’t hide in the bathroom all night.She splashed her face with water, used the toilet-like stool in the corner, and went back into the room.The lights were dimmed and through the window she could see the quiet, bright stars of endless space.A quiet hum filled the room.
Vaxa was watching her from the bed.Kate went to her side, slid under the fur covers, and faced the window, her back to him.
