“Excuse me?”
“You’re shutting your business down, Deena. This has gone on long enough.”
My chest felt like it was caving in. Cal stood before me, a pillar of swirling, aggressive, immovable energy. I felt small and weak and terrified before him where before I’d felt safe and cherished.
But that was all a lie, wasn’t it?
He never cared about me. He only cared about possessing me.
My heart cracked, and pain rushed into me. It pierced my chest and stabbed my gut. It sent tingles down to my fingers and toes and pulsed through my skull. Everything hurt.
Cal saw none of it. He’d been so in tune with my every need before, and now I didn’t exist. He just went on in that implacable, hard voice: “There’s no reason for you to work. You’re stressing yourself out, and that could hurt the baby.”
“You don’t think that maybe what’s stressing me out isyou?”
“The baby?—”
“Is that all you care about? Everything I tell you just goes in one ear and out the other because my needs no longer matter. My wants are pointless and unworthy of even being heard. You’ve decreed that my business is a silly little female hobby, and I should give it up because you say so. You know best. Am I reading this right?”
Cold chips of ice glared at me. Cal’s mouth thinned, and then he said only one word: “Yes.”
That was it—the end. In one word, he’d confirmed my worst fears.
I’d fallen for the one thing I’d tried to outrun. I’d forever tied my life to a man—because even if we weren’t together, we’d always be tied through our baby—and shrunk my life down to suit his whims. I’d followed in my mother’s footsteps and unwittingly did exactly what she always wanted for me. If I called her and told her that Cal insisted I shut down the business I’d spent my entire adult life building, she’d be the happiest woman in the world.
I was invisible. I was superfluous. I was unnecessary.
My movements felt heavy. I dipped my chin and let Cal guide me to the dining room. I ate as much as I could stomach, got ready for bed, and slipped under the covers.
Cal got in behind me and held me close, and tears wetted my pillow. His arms had felt so good for so long, but now I knew the truth; they were a prison.
The next day, I pretended to be asleep as he got ready for work. I waited an hour, then crawled out of bed and packed. I only took the necessities: my favorite clothes, my toiletries, my work things, my valuables. I ran into a housekeeper and one of the many nannies who took care of Lila, and I didn’t answer their questions about where I was going.
Once I was out of the building, I took a deep breath and scurried to the subway to go home.
Myhome. The only place that was safe now. The place I should’ve stayed all along.
THIRTY-FOUR
CALLUM
Deena didn’t answerthe text I sent her around midmorning or the call I placed at lunchtime. Our fight from last night lingered in my psyche like the remnants of an oil spill on the ocean, thick and polluting. I’d gotten carried away; I knew it.
Butwhydid Deena insist on working? I had enough money to last ten lifetimes. Her business made ends meet—but she didn’t need to do that anymore. It would be better for her, for me, and for the baby for her to relax and let me take care of everything.
And why wasn’t she answering the damn phone?
I changed tack and called my sister. Erica answered on the third ring. “Everything okay?”
“Can you go check on Deena?” I asked. “She’s not answering my calls.”
“Maybe she’s giving you a sign to back off, Cal.”
I rubbed the bridge of my nose. I wasn’t in the mood for my sister’s sanctimonious, know-it-all bullshit. “Forget it. I’ll ask one of the staff to do it.”
“Calm your horses,” she said. “I’m onmy way.”
Sure enough, I heard a door open and the sound of footsteps. As I sat behind my desk, my knee bounced. I pulled my phone away from my ear to check it when it buzzed, but it was just an email. Still no text from Deena.
